There is so much to love about summer.
The routines relax. Bedtimes stretch a little later into long evenings. We travel. We visit grandparents and cousins. We take road trips. We eat foods we wouldn’t normally eat. We pack far too much into some days and absolutely nothing into others.
It’s a wonderful season.
But I’ve noticed that when our family’s normal rhythms loosen, something else can quietly creep in.
Complaining.
I became particularly aware of it during one of our family road trips this summer. With four children, it seemed as though every hour brought another complaint:
“Why does this drive have to take so long?”
“This chicken tastes funny.”
“I wish we could go fishing.”
“We never get to go to the toy store and buy anything.”
As I listened to the chorus of complaints, I realized I wasn’t just hearing my children. I was hearing myself too.
“This traffic is horrible.”
“There are so many tourists here.”
“I wish this line would move faster.”
None of these comments were especially serious on their own. In fact, most were understandable. But together they were shaping the atmosphere of our family. Little by little, grumbling was becoming more normal than gratitude.
I realized this wasn’t simply a behavior issue. It was a discipleship issue.
Paul writes these striking words:
“Do all things without grumbling or disputing.” (Philippians 2:14, ESV)
Do all things.
Not just the enjoyable things.
Not just the convenient things.
Not just the days that go according to plan.
Even the uncomfortable moments. Even the disappointing ones. Even the ordinary frustrations of everyday family life.
Gulp.
As I reflected on this passage, I couldn’t help but think of Israel in the wilderness. Again and again they grumbled (Exodus 16:2, Numbers 14:2, 16:41)—about the food, the journey, the leadership, and even against God, longing to return to Egypt.
God used their circumstances that led to their grumbling to humble them and test them, revealing what was in their hearts (Deuteronomy 8:2). At the root of it all, they struggled to trust God’s provision.
The same can be true of us.
Complaining often reveals something deeper than inconvenience. It can expose a heart that is struggling with contentment, resisting what God has presently given, or believing that joy is always found somewhere else.
Of course, this doesn’t mean we never express sadness, disappointment, or genuine hardship. Scripture is full of honest lament. God welcomes our cries.
Grumbling is something different.
It is the repeated habit of voicing dissatisfaction and critique in what is wrong or bad in a situation instead of bringing our hearts to God with trust and choosing to focus on—and voice with our words—what is right or good.
The encouraging news is that we are not left to fight this battle alone.
When complaining begins to settle into the atmosphere of your home, perhaps try a few simple practices:
Talk about it. Read Philippians 2:14 together and discuss why this standard was laid forth by Paul. Ask, “How are we living up to this or not? What does grumbling sound like in our family lately?”
Repent quickly. When you catch yourself complaining, simply stop, ask God’s forgiveness, and begin again.
Ask for the Spirit’s help. The same Holy Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead lives within us and has the power to produce love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control at any given moment we call upon Him. As parents, we can invite our children—and ourselves—to depend on His strength instead of our own.
Practice gratitude. Intentionally thank God for what He has provided, especially when you are tempted to focus on what you wish were different.
Gently remind one another. Not with shame, but with grace. Maybe come up with a catchy phrase that will remind someone to exchange their grumbling for gratitude.
The cool part is that Paul doesn’t stop with the command.
He continues:
“...that you may be…children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world.” (Philippians 2:15)
What a remarkable thought.
One of the ways Christians shine in a dark world is by becoming people marked by contentment instead of constant complaint.
This summer, perhaps one of the greatest habits we can cultivate as a family isn’t finding one more activity or making one more memory.
Perhaps it’s learning—by the grace of God—to replace grumbling with gratitude.
That kind of home shines brightly.
From My Heart and Home to Yours,
Ali
Thanks for reading Homes of Glory! This post is public so feel free to share it.
Homes of Glory provides biblical encouragement & practical tips to help families stay grounded and growing in Jesus Christ.
Comments
Nothing yet. Say the first thing.
Sign in to join the conversation.