#04 - On Gratitude

Dear Friend,

Do you know the two magic words? Growing up, Mother always harped on and on about these two magic words, how they paved the way for kindness, and even if they failed then it was the other person’s loss, not mine. “Please” and “Thank You”. Yes, yes, thank you is one word.

When was the last time you had an honest conversation? There was no signalling, no shame in/at your flaws, and no fear in being seen as you are? I find it weird that we are all in one way hoping to be understood, to be seen and accepted as we are, but also hide behind words we do not mean, words we do not believe, or awkward silences. Therefore, when I find myself thrust into a conversation with someone who is not afraid to be honest with themselves, and with me, my face lights up and I become a blabbermouth. I had a couple of those this week; I am grateful for these moments.

Do you think it is weird to tell someone “thank you” for doing their job? Say you are a doctor doing rounds and a nurse gives you some update on your patient, do you say thank you? Or the security guard opens the door for you at your favourite eatery, do you say thank you? I do not think it is. I have heard many people around me say that those people have salaries. I do not know, but that just does not sit well with me. It is probably Mother reminding me to say thank you.

I cannot believe that I have consistently written to you for the past one month. Perhaps what even baffles me more is that I look forward to writing to you. I guess in the midst of all the chaos in my life right now, it is nice to have something that I can be grateful for; to have somewhere that I can shout into the void. Some days, I am lucky – there is an echo. I do not feel so alone. Other days, I am not – the release must be enough.

I am trying so hard not to mention how terrified I am living in Nigeria now, afraid that I will bore you because the fear is like the mercies of the Lord – new every morning. Firefighters, whom I have never seen in my life – not even when I pass the Fire Service every Friday after CDS (NYSC is a waste), are about to be given guns. This is how I am dealing with it...

Oris@_Ortodox

“Your house is burning ansowat? My fren hands up”

Instablog9ja @instablog9ja

FG has disclosed plans to provide the Federal Fire Service with guns, thereby setting up what it calls ‘Fire Police’

8:32 AM · Jul 4, 2021

832 Reposts · 808 Likes

I received a voice note from one friend who had read my previous letters and wanted to respond to all the questions I posed in those letters. In my last letter, I told you I was a softie so I figure you can imagine just how much this gesture meant to me. Kindness like this floors me because I realise just how much effort it took not only to read my letters but also to send me a 22-minute voice note sharing his thoughts with me about those letters. I am grateful for this friend, immensely, and indeed to you, reading this letter writing now. The mere thought of you sitting in front of your screen now and reading my words warms my heart. For a whole month. I am entering this week with gratitude for you, my friend.

As always, I really hope this letter finds you better than yesterday, a little lighter. As things get more expensive, and living continues to be hard, I hope you find things, and most importantly, people who lighten your load. And when you do, be grateful for them; do not take them for granted.

I wonder if Mother will be pleased that these days I do not grumble to show my gratitude, that I mean it even more than she would have ever thought. I will never know; it is a dicey thing – admitting to your parents that they are right about one thing. Don’t you think? (You can’t be right about everything, Mother)

Thank you for showing up today.

Thank you for listening to me.

Have a lovely week, friend.

Signing off to Anew by Hollow Coves

“the sun will rise with each new day

don’t let this life you have slip away

(live for another day)”

Sine Cera

Osondu

Thank you for reading all the way to the end. If you would love this delivered to your (email) address just like a letter, then don’t forget to sign up here. Cheers!