Banging Twins. Exceptionally Sexy Erotica by DICK THRUSTER

I’m often asked if I’d ever break from my usual style and be tempted to write something from a *male* perspective instead of my usual female focused leads. While it’s something I’d genuinely love to attempt, I fear I simply don’t possess the talent for it.

BUT, fear not!

Given there’s clearly demand for some male-centric sexual tales, I’ve pulled some strings and called in a friend to pen some for me instead.

But not just any friend, dear readers, because you deserve the best. He is a leading light in the field of erotic literature. A man with such an innate understanding of sex, sensuality and eroticism, it has to be read to be believed. A man who has had *so much* sex in his life that his sexual milometer/odometer looks like it’s clicked back round to zero.

Please welcome to Substack the incredibly masculine and manly;

DICK THRUSTER

Johnson Cumhard awoke from his erotic sex dream with a smile on his face and the tremendous sense of satisfaction that can come only from thoroughly satisfying two gorgeous busty identical twins while you sleep. Even his unconscious mind couldn’t escape his Olympian sexual skills, and Johnson was just fine with that. Something else had also very much woken up, and was currently pitching his bedsheets almost a foot up away from rest of his ripped body. But he’d get to that in a moment.

First he glanced to his left, looking over the buff and shredded enormity that was his bicep in order to see her.

Titania Bosomly.

Her long red hair rested on her pillow like hair laying on a pillow. The sunlight shone through the window cascading off the fulsome roundness of her breasts like a beautiful golden waterfall splashing on a fantastic pair of tits.

And Johnson certainly knew a thing or two about splashing on tits.

She was still fast asleep which was understandable. Last night, Johnson had rocked her world harder than his favourite band ‘The Awesome Fuckers’ had rocked that music festival where he’d spent the entire weekend having massive orgies in his tent. His sleeping bag hadn’t seen much sleep, I can tell you! Literally the only way she could have been rocked any harder is if she’d been found guilty of a crime in one of those places where you get stoned to death.

But no one was dead here, I can’t stress that enough. Everyone was alive and everything was hot and steamy. Only the temperature was clement and the steam would actually come later in the shower. Along with someone else, if you know what I mean. Titania lay breathing sexily. Her breasts heaved up and down with every breath, her sex appeal only rising with every rise and fall. Without the fall. Because it kept going up. She was sexy as fuck.

Johnson gave himself a mini fist pump because he’d totally tapped that hottie last night. And by ‘fist pump’ I mean in the ‘celebration of achievement’ way. He wasn’t pumping any other part of himself with his own fist. He had no need for that. Women were literally queuing up for that privilege.

And, boy, was it a privilege.

Johnson’s dick had been describe by three former Miss World’s, one former Miss Universe, that actress with the big tits that’s on every guy’s freebie list, and Johnson’s own high-school crush as having a dick that ‘could be the eighth wonder of the world’. And those women had never even met so it’s not like they discussed it first. They were each individually so in awe of what Johnsonn was packing that they said it without any kind of prompting. Three of them literally screamed it while it was making them cum, and the others said it far more femininely and sensually a little afterwards, when they’d come to their senses and had time to think about it.

Next, he turned to look to his right, eyes first passing over his incredible abs and six pack on the way. And there she was. The smoking hot blonde with cans that were worthy of a cancan. Or any dance which would have them jiggling. Her first name was Mammary, but everyone called her Jugs because of how impressive her chest was. And she was cool with it. She probably gave herself the nickname because she’s one of those real women who doesn’t get all offended by a guy looking at her tits, unlike the snowflakes you find today.

Her full name?

Jugs Bosomly.

That’s right. SISTERS.

Because, guess what, it HADN’T just been a dream. Johnson had been up all night banging ACTUAL TWINS.

And not just any twins - The sexiest sort of twins.

IDENTICAL TWINS!

(Except they had different colour hair, but they did that just so there was a way to tell them apart and also because it’s totally hotter that way. They were identical in every other way. Even their pussies were identical. You could have looked at both and been like ‘Wow, am I looking at one pussy in a mirror here?’ Hot, right?)

Now Johnson knew why he’d woken up so rock hard. And he knew exactly what he was going to do about it.

“Morning ladies.” said Johnson, his voice as deep and gravely as an avalanche of rocks in a quarry.

“Mmm, morning Johnson” said both Jugs and Titania together, totally synchronised. Which they can do because they’re twins and they have like semi-psychic powers. It’s real and there’s research and everything that proves it, look it up, Sheeple!

Titania lifted her head from the pillow and her long red hair followed her. Her chest wobbled like ripples across a pond as she rested herself on one elbow.

“I can’t believe how hard you made me cum last night.” she said, her voice sexy in an indefinable way because how do you explain sounds using written words? Impossible.

“Yeah, you were unbelievable!” said Jugs as she rolled over onto her stomach, her tits shifting like two epic iceburgs only warm and inviting. If the Titanic had crashed into these, Leo Di Caprio would have died a much happier man.

“Can you do it again?” they both said as one, giggling. A sexy giggle, not the annoying kind that some women have. There was nothing annoying about the Bosomly twins. They were literally like one perfect woman. But twice, because there’s two of them.

The only tough decision for Johnson was where to start? Whoever he went to first would feel like they were his favourite and the other might feel left out, even though there was more than enough Johnson for everyone. Hell, they could have been triplets or maybe even quadruplets and there’d still be some of him going spare. He’d maybe have to try that some time to really put himself to the test.

[Note for future Dick: Write a story about Johnson fucking QUINTUPLETS. Remember to delete this note before posting]

There was only one thing for it: Multitasking. A thing that, despite what women might think, men can definitely do. And do WELL. Better than women, actually.

With his left had, Johnson reached over to fondle Titania’s tremendous tits. With his right, he grabbed a massive manly handful of Jugs’ just-as-juicy jugs.

Nobody knew the intricate path to female pleasure quite like Johnson. He was basically a one-man orgasm generating machine. With the skill of a precision engineer, he twisted and turned the Twins’ erect nipples like the dials of a radio in a submarine operating deep inside enemy territory.

Except Jugs and Titania would be getting MUCH wetter.

“Mmm, yeah. Just like that, Daddy!” screamed Titania, because she was the slightly kinkier of the two, being a redhead. Her body thrashed and writhed in pleasure at his touch. Yes, Daddy knew what he was doing.

“Woah, slow down Johnson!” said Jugs who was also kinky but hid it a little so it was even more fun when it eventually came out. She was already squealing from sheer sexual ecstasy and that was just as a result what he was doing with his finger and thumb. “I don’t want to orgasm already, not until I’ve felt your absolutely enormous cock inside me again… It’s like the eighth wonder of the world!”

Johnson laughed out loud. “LOL!” Then he said into his watch; “Hey Siri, add another entry to my Wonders list. Name: Jugs Bosomly.”

Johnson had an Apple watch because he was wealthy and very successful. He also had a Rolex, but he preferred the functionality of a watch that could tell him how many calories he was burning while he was fucking all night.

The answer: All of them.

“Add my name too!” said Titania, hornily. “I also think you’re wonderful!”

“LOL, that’s not quite how it works, babe.” replied Johnson, laughing out loud again. “But don’t worry. You’re on the only list that really matters…”

He paused for effect. The air was electric with anticipation, the women perched on the edge of desire.

“…my fuckit list!”

Like a bucket list, but for sex. Johnson was also hilarious. He could have become a stand up comedian if he wanted to, but he was way too Alpha for something as stupid as that.

Both Twins were already gushing like Niagara after Johnson’s twenty-three seconds of nipple play but, even though he absolutely could have done, he didn’t go straight to knocking the Mario coins out of the pair with his enormous dick just yet.

Because the reason every single woman of the thousands Johnson had ever had sex with would beg to fuck him again was simple. It wasn’t just his gargantuan member, or his ripped and shredded bod, or his money, or his success, or his charisma, or his intelligence. It was because he always gave them a little bit extra.

The secret is in the name, but most people are too stupid to see it. Not Johnson though. He saw it as clearly as if he was looking at the numbers in the Matrix and knew what they meant.

It’s called foreplay.

FOUR play.

You’ve gotta do FOUR things!

The Twins had already been turned on via the nipples and, even though they were begging and pleading with Johnson to be inside them, he had three other things to do before he’d grant them the gift of a visit to pound town.

He pulled back the sheets of his enormous king sized bed - Or queen sized, whichever’s bigger - and looked at the two naked women lying there. They were both absolute smokeshows. Legs, tits, hair; everything you could describe looked hot as fuck. And as for their asses, two more perfect and unblemished peaches you’d never find. Except rather than being peach coloured they were white and made of soft skin. And both were blemished with red handprint marks from the hard spanking he’d given them the night before.

Two perfect bruised peaches. Looking tasty and good enough to eat.

But ass wasn’t on the menu this morning. Peaches should come with cream and nobody wants cream for breakfast. Except in your coffee. And Johnson took his coffee black like a man, not white like a snowflake.

No, Johnson was heading downtown to something else entirely.

For some pussy.

Nobody knew pussy better than him. Most guys think they understand it, but they actually haven’t a clue. Lots of women too. But Johnson was like an explorer. A sexual Captain Cook. Captain Fuck. He’d mapped out regions of the female anatomy not even women knew they had.

The Clitoris. The G-spot. Johnson knew about them all. And he knew exactly how to get to/in/on/under/over them to make a woman scream his name so hard he’d had to buy his neighbours ear defenders. He’d even discovered a wholly new pleasure organ inside the vagina that was still unknown to medical science. He called it the ‘Inner Left Orgasmic Flange’, but the world wasn’t ready for the secrets of the ILOF just yet. His friend Eric claimed to have discovered the ‘Inner Right Orgasmic Flange’ but Johnson told him that was fucking ridiculous and it turned out Eric has just slipped it in her asshole by mistake.

As he headed below the waist, Johnson could see both women were wetter than a bank holiday weekend. [Maybe change to ‘the pre-cum on a cuck’s cock’ for US readers]. They were gushing so hard it was going to be like white water rafting getting anything done.

But Johnson was the man for the job.

He would use his mouth on Jugs, and his hand on Titania. He was just as skilled with both so no one would be missing out. He might even switch, if they were lucky.

The only way Johnson could ever be associated with the word switch. He was a Dom all the way.

He took a deep breath and plunged his rugged manly face into one pussy, and his rugged manly hand into the other.

Their clits and g-spots exploded with pleasure at the touch of his tongue and fingers as they did exactly what they needed to do.

“Fuck yeah, fuck yeah, Daddy…” said Titania erotically, already close to cumming.

“Yeah, just like that Daddy!” said Jugs sensually, no longer pretending not to be kinky anymore.

Johnson worked his magic with tongue and fingers on clits and g-spots in ways you can only know when you’ve had as much sex as him. Needless to say, everything he did simply heightened their pleasure.

It took fewer than ten seconds for both women to orgasm.

In perfect unison the twins said: “OH FUCK!” and squirted all over his face and fingers. It was like a fire hydrant had burst. Twice.

Johnson stayed pleasuring their pussies for another fifteen, maybe twenty seconds. They both had multiple orgasms. Multiple multiple orgasms, actually. More than he could count.

By the end, nearly a full thrity seconds later, he was wet from head to toe, utterly doused with their pleasure juices.

And now, it was his turn.

“Ladies. Prepare to get fucked!”

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