There Is Something Worse Than Death

Hi Sibling,

I’m writing this to you around 8:00pm, Friday evening. I just got back from a worship meeting.

I hardly go to meetings like this with physical expectations like, Lord my academics, Lord my business or Lord healing. The only time I bring expectations like that are on behalf of someone else. Now not that it is wrong, no. After all, the Bible says, “With prayer and supplication, make your requests known to God.” The Bible also says, “Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and its righteousness and every other thing shall be added unto you.”

Christ has helped me come into an understanding that nothing filthy, wrong, or unholy can follow me into the presence of God.

So long as I am in His will, things begin to fall in alignment, and every need is met in ways only He can orchestrate.

The expectations I carry are different. I go longing for my eyes and ears to be opened to see and hear clearly what the Lord is showing and telling me. For my desires to be purified and refined until the only thing I hunger and thirst for is Christ. That Anita Adaeze must decrease so that Christ may increase. That I am consumed by the love of Christ. That I encounter Him in deeper ways that make my roots in Him grow deeper.

And today, I heard the Lord call my name and speak to me loud and clear, and I understood what it must have felt like for Samuel.

I am thanking God for the opportunity to build intimacy with Him. That I can directly fellowship and commune with Him, no guilt, no veil, no restriction. I studied 2 Corinthians 3:18 recently and it opened my eyes to something new… but that is a conversation for another day.

In October and November, I got to experience the Fatherhood of God in a way I never have before, and it changed me deeply.

Now to you, dear sibling, I do not know where you stand with God at this very moment, or what your current experiences with Him look like. But I know this: intimacy with God is not reserved for a special few. It is an open invitation to all who desire Him. It is not about performance, but posture.

There is a place in Christ where striving ends and sonship begins. A place where you are not trying to impress God but learning to simply be with Him. Where prayer is no longer a rushed routine but a quiet conversation of love.

And I have come to realise this truth: there is something worse than death. It is a life lived without ever experiencing the love of Christ. To exist without knowing His affection, His presence, His intimacy, that is an unfulfilled life, a life that has missed its deepest purpose.

I pray that your eyes will be opened to behold Him, not just as Lord, but as the One who delights in you. That your ears will be tuned to His voice, even in stillness. That your heart will be softened to desire Him above every noise, every distraction, every lesser affection.

May you come to know what it means to be consumed by His love. To be refined, pruned, and shaped, not out of fear, but from deep affection. May you decrease daily, and may Christ increase in you, until your life becomes a reflection of His glory.

Amen.

All my love,

Adaeze, your sibling in Christ. 💌

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