Learn to say "yes" and "no"

The way the conversation went between my best friend and I:

Her:

I’m just not feeling that good.

Me: 

Wanna call?

Her: 

Not now…maybe later?

me checking the time. It’s 8:47pm.

Me:

Call me when you’re free.

Call comes in at 10:42pm.

I could’ve said no. I could’ve said that I need to go to sleep. I could’ve told her that I need to fix my sleep schedule and that we can talk later.

I could’ve.

But I didn’t.

And I don’t see anything wrong.

I’ve heard so much about maintaining discipline. Being disciplined and consistent and not letting anything hinder your progress.

But I don’t completely agree.

I believe exceptions need to be made.

Exceptions that respect boundaries but still keep you connected.

Balance. In other words.

I believe that the idea of needing to be flexible is so important because what is the point of working so hard, being disciplined and achieving every single thing you want…but having no one to celebrate it with?

Even the greatest achievement will start to feel pointless after a while.

Focusing on yourself isn’t bad. In fact, I feel it is the best gift you could give to yourself. But life doesn’t work like that.

You’re not the only one living in this world.

There are other people. Some closer to you than others.

And whether we like it or not, sometimes being present is more important than being disciplined.

Be flexible.

But not too flexible.

Don’t be the only one who compromises all the time. Don’t forget your boundary, your rules and your values. Because they count just as much as being there for those you care about.

I’m not saying you start compromising for everyone out there. But do it for the handful that matter. The handful that you know will stay. The ones who will cheer you on and help you up on your feet when things go wrong.

Do it for them.

When my best friend texted me. I could’ve said no. I could’ve put discipline on top of connection. I could’ve left her waiting.

But I didn’t.

Not because I HAD to call her. But because I wanted to.

Not because discipline and order didn’t matter to me. But because connection, understanding and the individual itself mattered more.

Priorities.

That’s what I mean.

Know your priorities.

Don’t be fooled by those Instagram reels which romanticise disappearing and re-emerging as someone unrecognisable. That’s not real life.

You can’t do that.

People care about you. And if you go off the radar for a bit, they will reach out. Vanishing isn’t an option.

But knowing your priorities and becoming a better version of yourself around them is the most important.

Because that’s a skill that counts.

So go be a better version. Become unstoppable. But don’t do it alone.

Where’s the fun in that?