You Are Exactly Where You Need To Be

18 months ago, I was in a coaching session with one of my mentors and she said something while I was in full overshare mode that frankly…. rather annoyed me.I was knee-deep in shoulda, woulda, coulda.
Spinning life and work like a woman who should have taken a holiday five years ago.

And she said, very calmly:
“Wherever you are right now, don’t make it wrong.”

Now, don’t get me wrong… When you feel like you’re sat on a large pile of shoulda, woulda, coulda, unsure what decision to make, weighed down by overwhelm, his is not what you want to hear from anyone. Especially a coach you’re paying a lot of money for!

I wanted a plan. A step-by-step rescue mission. A magic wand.

But instead, I got that line.
And as much as I didn’t want it… it was exactly what I needed.

My thoughts shifte, not dramatically (Well actually yes it kinda was dramatic, just not in a jump up and down, but an immediate, quite knowing… ahhhhh thats quite powerful)
After I got over the initial “How dare she” thought, my shoulders dropped. My breathing slowed. My body went from hot panting dog to cool calm cat.And for the first time in a while, I felt slightly different about my situation.

What if this wasn’t wrong? What if this was part of the process — my process?
What if the frustration, confusion, and comparison were simply my human experience doing its work?

When I saw it that way, my nervous system began to regulate. The “now, now, now” urgency quietened down. And a little space opened up for curiosity.

“So what if this is part of my journey?
What does that look and feel like?”

And from that softer place, strategy started to appear —
Not the big, shiny kind. The gentle, practical kind.
The kind that frankly, we could all do with more of.

The kind where you say, “Alright, what if I just set the next stepping stone down there… and see how that feels?” And then maybe the next.
And then maybe I pause for a moment on that stone and realise…
the world hasn’t stopped spinning.

It’s okay.
I’m okay.

So my question or statement for you:

(Please skip the part of feeling how dare she suggest this to me)

Yes, sometimes your “right now” might be scary, painful, frustrating, or risky.
It might not feel fair, spoiler alert, life often is not fair.
You might want to fast-forward to the bit where it all makes sense and someone else has dealt with your stuff for you.
(Yep — another rough pill to swallow: no one is coming to do that.)

But maybe… just maybe… this is the bit that’s shaping you.
The lesson. The grit. The recalibration. Your own hero’s journey, mid-chapter.

Don’t make it wrong.
You’re exactly where you need to be.

With Love Abigail x

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