On quality time and paying attention

Welcome to Documented, and thanks for being here.

Today, I’m sharing a few pockets of good things from the last stretch of winter.

In the spring of 2023, I found myself at a low point—navigating a breakup, a shoulder injury, and finishing my first year living in Berlin. I felt anxious about a future I couldn’t quite see, so in an effort to stay rooted to the present (and after being so exhausted writing too much about my feelings), I decided to wrap up each week in my journal with pockets of good things.

Pockets of good things is just a fancier way of saying gratitude list, but it’s one I love to say and write. When life feels overwhelming, it helps to look for the small moments that still make it matter.

My younger brother, Clar, just left Berlin a week ago, after hosting him for ten days.

It was our first time spending a lot of quality time together as adults. It was a good excuse to take time off this past month and show him around my city. I hope he enjoyed it as much as I did.

We took a half day trip to Potsdam for Museum Barberini, one of my favorite museums, filled with Impressionist paintings. How luxurious it is to not stare at my computer screen at the start of the week, and instead, looking at paintings!

I always turn on the speakers at breakfast, and played Closer by Tegan and Sara.

My brother and I have adjacent music tastes, so I ask him if he knows this song, to which he says, “yeah of course achi, you play it all the time!” Oops, guilty.

Sure, bringing the TV box to the basement is no biggie, but somehow, I couldn’t get myself to do it—and it only took my brother 5 minutes to bring it down. That, and breaking down all of my boxes that took up so much space in the hallway (happy to report it has all been disposed to the Altpapier bin). Sometimes, having someone around just makes everything ten times easier.

I finally had my shelves drilled in every room on a Thursday morning (not by me, I could never trust myself with these things). This filled me with so much anxiety—it was probably the combination of noise, being 100% sure where each shelf goes, and my lack of experience with drilling things on walls.

It’s so weird to see some parts of my space change, but I’m also so excited to see it evolve now that I have more wall storage and areas to decorate.

I shared an apartment tour (it’s giving MTV Cribs!) over at my art club. Check out the exclusive video here 🏠

There are numerous photoautomats around the city—analog photo booths where you can take black and white portraits. Except for one, that only prints in color.

I made sure to plot this side quest while in Friedrichshain, as I wanted Clar to take home an iconic Berlin souvenir. We took our own self-portraits, and took one with both of us that I cut in half, to remember his visit by.

I love art, but I also love science—and I love how complementary they are. From seeing airplane engines to visual advertising promoting commercial air travel, to discovering the origins of road transport in Germany, I had the best afternoon exploring this museum that has been on my list for so long.

Here’s a video diary of my very touristy week around the city:

I’m at that part of winter where I feel like escaping from my own reality (and the world) for a bit, so I picked up Atmosphere from my stack of books sitting on my nightstand. I’m looking forward to get lost in a good book (I love TJR’s books, especially Daisy Jones and the Six).

I definitely had an excuse to rewatch Can’t Buy Me Love (currently on Episode 32 of 148, omg), use my red fountain pen ink, and put fruits on the table (mom’s orders).

It took me ten (!) visits to IKEA to finally cave in and splurge on a higher quality duvet cover. To be fair, I was easily swayed with the orange and green sheets (which, conveniently, were affordable). After much canvassing, I decided on these sheets and when I say they keep me warm and cozy on cold winter nights, for some reason, they really do. I am a changed woman.

I woke up feeling extra nauseous and lethargic for no particular reason these past few days. It could have been the weather, accumulated work fatigue, or lack of sleep. I even suspected caffeine withdrawal since I hadn’t had coffee all week, unintentionally.

Theories aside, I decided to take days off and work within my limited energy.

I’m diagnosed with PCOS, and I’ve learned that stress can drain me quickly. Moments like this remind me to pay attention and listen to my body. I’m extremely grateful that working for myself allows me to rest when I need to.

Happy to report that I’ve been taking my side quests seriously! I wrote more about it here, but it has definitely become a mainstay in my everyday life.

Film has been my theme lately. With Berlinale in full swing, I attended a talk with Olivier Bugge Coutté and Eskil Vogt on collaborating with Joachim Trier for Sentimental Value.

Later in the week, Ven invited me to a screening of Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros. I had known about this film since it came out in 2005, but I only got to watch it 20 years later.

Director Kanakan-Balintagos did a Q&A after the screening, and we both asked questions (of course we did, we’re proud Filipinos). After the program, he approached us, hugged us, and thanked us for coming. I didn’t realize this happened and it felt like a fever dream, but it truly made my day.

Lastly, I watched Enjoy Your Stay with some friends to wrap up the week—not an ideal thing to do at 10 in the morning on a Saturday, but definitely worth watching.

May this be an invitation to find your own pockets of good things, and I hope you stay warm in the last stretches of winter.

💛 Abbey

Leave a comment