Choose the Right Partner - Committing to the right person is the most important decisions you'll make. Being with someone you love and who makes you happy can make even the toughest choices feel lighter. Life becomes more fulfilling. Building a strong relationship takes a lot of work, but facing the ups and downs as a couple makes both stronger. Take all the time you need before committing—but once you do, commit ferociously.
Have Kids - I can think of many reasons why to have kids, but the #1 reason is that they teach you how to love. They’ll end up teaching you more than you ever expected. To them, failure happens often, but it goes by quickly. Having kids is much harder and much better than one can expect.
How to make Kids happy - Making kids happy it’s simpler than one could think: love them, be there, and show them the world.
Make Family a Priority - The family you’re born into can be a blessing or a curse. Letting go of the people who raised you is extremely hard and painful, but sometimes necessary. Regardless of the family you come from, the family you build is what truly matters. Build it with love, joy, and intention. Nothing will bring you more happiness. Giving your kids a safe, supportive, and joyful home is one of the greatest gifts you can offer, and one they will remember forever.
Keep a Small Circle - Be intentional with the friends you keep. The number of people who truly match your energy and values is smaller than you’d think. Surround yourself with those you admire, who make you laugh, and who you'd actually want your kids to grow up around. A handful of deep, meaningful friendships will always be more fulfilling than having dozens of casual acquaintances.
Life Compounds - Life really is a long-term game. Small efforts early on can lead to disproportional rewards later, but it takes time and persistence to keep going when you’re just starting. You might end up having kids with someone you first asked out for coffee, without even realizing you were going on a date. The best career opportunities come from working with talented people who enjoy working with you over time. Building wealth happens by investing your money early and consistently. Make your bets early and stick with them and double down when it feels simply feels right.
Define Success Early - Figuring out what you want from life is hard. The best way to get closer to an answer is to try a bunch of things, mess up often, and learn to let go of what doesn’t feel right. One powerful way to define success is to imagine your funeral. Who would be there? What would your family and closest friends say about you? That is what matters.
Stay Grounded - No one’s going to take care of you if you don’t take care of yourself first. Life’s tough. But offs are it was even tougher for the people who raised you. Ask your grandparents about how they grew up. Listen carefully. Ask plenty of questions. Your parents' childhood is still too close to yours, but your grandparents' childhood will feel like a different world. You’ll be surprised by how much things have changed, feel grateful for your own life, and develop a deeper appreciation for your ancestors.
Be Happy & Enjoy Life - Try to appreciate the good in your life, take some time to do things you love every now and then even if that sounds unproductive, don’t complain much, and just keep going.
Make Important Decisions - Some of the most important decisions you’ll make happen during random pillow-talk or while doing the dishes with your partner. Big questions tend to pop up when you’re not actively searching for answers. Like your mind is telling you to follow your gut. And often, your gut wants to check in with the person you trust most. Those small, quiet moments is where the biggest decisions happen.
Go through Hard Times - Life makes you go through hard times every now and then. Don’t act as a victim. Going through and getting out of hard times makes you learn more about yourself than good times, both in life and at work.
Mind & Body - Your body gives you signs if your mind is not well, and vice-versa.
Be Healthy - If life and work are long-term games, you should play them feeling loved, fit, rested, and energized. Eat well, exercise regularly, get enough sleep, spend time in nature, and build meaningful relationships. A good way of achieving it: eat at least 90% homemade food with a plenty of protein and veggies, exercise 6h/week combining strength, flexibility and cardio, go to bed early following the same routine every day, visit the park every other week, spend time-off in nature, dedicate as much time as possible to your partner, kids, and close friends, and have fun at work.
Build Discipline - Discipline is like competing with yourself to do what’s right and necessary, even when you don’t feel like it. Discipline is way more valuable than talent because if you just avoid stupid decisions in life, you’ll get far no matter what.
Understand Freedom - People often think of freedom as having no constraints, but those people are oftentimes not that happy or free. True freedom comes from the constraints you commit yourself to. As long as you can choose what you commit yourself to, you’re free (and most likely happy).
Importance of Money - Money doesn’t buy you happiness, but being unsure if you have enough money to make it until the end of the month will make you miserable. Having enough money gives you peace of mind. That's priceless.
Take Advice with a Grain of Salt - People offer advice based on what they optimize life for, even when they mean well. Be cautious about taking advice literally.
Learn Voraciously - Talk to people often. Observe the world. Read frequently and prefer long content (knowledge is detail and nuance). Avoid: Staying behind a screen, endlessly scrolling the web and social media, watching TV, and paying tons of attention to the "news".
Try Something New Often - There’s something about trying new stuff that makes you feel happier, especially if it comes with some risks. It makes life more interesting and helps you feel alive instead of stuck in a rut.
Push Hard - Sense of urgency, agency, and focus are among the most valuable skills independently of what you do. They are also very hard to train. Push hard, even if and especially when it seems scary.
Be Nice to People - Speak good of the people you love, especially when they’re not around. And be nice to strangers, even when it doesn’t matter.
Do Things that most People Won’t - The sunrise is just as beautiful as the sunset, but only a few people get to see it.
Deliver on Your Promises - Delivering on your promises to other people is a bigger edge than most people realize. There’s no better currency in a relationship than trust, and acting according to your words is the best way to build trust.
Don't Chase Status - What friends of friends, acquaintances, and strangers think of your decisions doesn't matter. The only people whose opinion really matter is your partner and kids.
Connect in Person - The energy you share face-to-face is also unmatched. While you can stay connected in the “world of bits”, the most important relationships are built and honed in the “world of atoms”. Walking while talking to your partner is therapy—and also best way to solve disagreements. Also applies to work.
Avoid Regret - When you’re unsure, just go for it. Regret is one of the worst feelings that can stick for a long time.
Care about Physical Space - Aim for a physical space that is clean, with great aesthetics and natural light. It will make your days better.
Make Surprises in non-obvious Days - Everyone’s expects something from you in special dates like birthdays. Offer a gift or make a surprise to your partner or close friends every now or then in a ordinary day—just because. It makes them really happy.
Avoid Distractions - Avoiding distractions in life is probably amongst the hardest things to do nowadays considering the amount of stuff that hits our eyeballs. Most things don’t even matter. Build a strong sense to differentiate what matters and what doesn’t, and be relentless in getting rid of what doesn’t.
Don't Worry Too Much - Few things in life are as risky or dramatic as they first feel like. Avoid getting too worried, especially when it hits your sleep. Given enough time, people adapt to almost any context. Make therapy if that helps.
Work with Bright People on Hard Problems - The saying that you become the average of the people you spend the most time with is true, especially at work. When you work with people who are the best at what they do, you become smarter. This is even more important when you're working on hard problems, which you should, because that's the best way to stay ahead.
Evaluate Character - You see who people really are when things get hard. Anyone can seem kind, reliable, or trustworthy when life’s going well. But true character shows up when doing the right thing comes with a cost.
Look for Opportunities - Be aware the best opportunities in life often come when you least expect them. Embrace them as soon as you possibly can.
Time above Everything Else - "Days are long, but years are short" is true, especially with kids. Time is limited, and it's the only thing in life you cannot recover. Do what makes you happy and fulfilled, and cut negativity from your life, especially when caused by others. Occasionally check "Your Life in Weeks" - it's so scary that it will make you do something meaningful with your time. No one will remember you beyond your grandkids' kids—love and dedicate yourself to your loved ones now. That's the best use of time.
Thanks to Cláudia Pereira for reviewing.
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