This is the sixth virtual gathering in our Memos from Mamas Consciousness-Raising series.
Consciousness-Raising groups in the ‘60’s were a way for women to learn from each other’s life experiences by gathering together and sharing stories of oppression under the patriarchal systems that dominated their lives.
The main idea was encapsulated in the saying: The personal is political. Women understood the problems they were facing personally were actually being caused by systemic sexism; and, therefore, it was not enough to tell their stories. They must use their experiences as a basis for making societal and legal change.
We are reviving the spirit of these innovative gatherings with this series to address what is arguably the most harmful form of systemic sexism: the court-enabled theft of children from mothers in the agenda to continue men’s power and control after divorce.
Whereas the '60’s consciousness-raising groups were the cultural foundation for the women’s civil rights movement, our virtual gatherings serve as a basis for the empowerment of women in their role as mothers post-separation, something that has been mostly ignored by the women’s movement thus far.
We listen here with minds and hearts to a few of the countless victims of systemic discrimination in family courts, women who have fought valiantly for custody and/or protection of their children.
Please share to help spread awareness.
NEW: There is now a Substack subsection with all the Memos from Mamas gatherings in one place, linked on the home page menu bar. You may still access them individually in the archives: first, second, third, fourth, and fifth.
NOTE: These messages have been sent to The Women’s Coalition, mostly via the contact form. Names are not used so as to protect privacy. If you want to comment on a mom’s message, you can refer to her story by number.
We left off our last gathering with Mama 39 and begin today with Mama 40.
My daughter went to her father’s for a two week visit of make up time. It’s been two years, and she hasn’t been back.
The guardian ad litem [GAL] tells the judge that she is doing better with her father.
I haven’t seen her for two years and yet I was the one taking her to all her doctors appointments. Her father wouldn’t even comply with the time sharing.
I have spent over a half million dollars trying to bring her back.
I miss her terribly.
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I have been fighting my rapist and abuser for 5 years while he and his 20 year-old girlfriend destroy a once loving relationship I had with my 4 children (10, 8, 6, 4) and take every dime they can squeeze out of me on top of it.
My daughter won’t even talk to me now, and that only happened after she revealed the abuse they were suffering and were taken (and still not given back to me). When the assault charges were dropped against my ex and his girlfriend, they were forced to go back to the home that was hurting them.
My son who is 8 is starting to talk like that too, and they pretend that they’re just doing what the children want by obstructing visits.
It hurts so much and I can’t afford a lawyer. I want to change the laws to protect mothers just like me. It’s nice to not be alone, but it’s heartbreaking to know there’s so many of us suffering this injustice.
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I was stripped of custody and parenting time two years ago.
I was so demeaned and abused in the family court system that I became seriously ill and had to take a leave of absence from work.
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Thank you for bringing attention to this!
I was forced to sign over custody of my daughter without due process based on false allegations of medical neglect. My daughter’s medical needs were extensive & she suffered life threatening conditions as a result of that removal. Not to mention the trauma from being forced to be away from me & into the home of a pedophile.
That was 16 years ago. She is 18 now & we are trying so hard to help her process & deal with the long term effects.
I am currently facing a “high-conflict” custody battle with the father of my 4 year old who is weaponizing the courts & our daughter against me. I am terrified of the process & potential outcome.
It gives me great hope to know that there are people who understand & are working to change the system. Thank you!!
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I was a child failed by our court system 25 years ago and now the same county court system is failing my baby boy. He’s now six and our abuser is about to get full custody because of a corrupt lawyer and GAL.
It’s SICK!
Our son has only been in his father’s life for 2 out of 6 years because of his neglect . Now our son is saying he is abusing and molesting him. We have proof and the court system and child services still sided with him and his false accusations!
He’s just a baby and I don’t know what else to do because they want to put ME in jail for trying to protect my baby!!!!
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I was stripped of custody and parenting time two years ago.
I was so demeaned and abused in the family court system that I became seriously ill and had to take a leave of absence from work.
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I left an abusive marriage and my mental health was used to take my (now) 10 year old daughter. I have tried to fight the system. The system wants money and for me to remain silent. I cannot and will not be silent.
I’m a pediatrician and a mother to 5 year old boy whom I lost completely due to family court abuse for speaking up about my safeguarding concerns and the domestic abuse/coercive control we have been suffering.
My child was unjustly and forcefully removed from me without any evidence of harm. The Judge and his social worker monkeys fabricated alienation concerns out of thin air.
I am in so much pain and I will give my all to see change and spread awareness and protect children and women from these generational crimes.
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I have be through the devastating family court system. Threatened with removing my child from me. Bogus alienation labels.
Because I dared to speak up about his violent and physically abusive behaviour. I went through 4 years of hell.
I discovered that social services and cafcass and psychologists are just a bunch of thugs who further enabled his abuse and out and out lied to the obnoxious misogynistic judges.
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Join The Women’s Coalition where we are raising awareness and demanding a new system for deciding custody.
Join Sisters in Solidarity, our activist group where we have monthly forums and plot to make change.
Join our Discrimination against Women in Family Court lawsuit.
The deadline has been extended for joining our Discrimination against Women in NY Family Court lawsuit.
After we filed last month, it garnered a lot of attention and many more women have requested to join. So we will be submitting an amended complaint on July 1st with the new moms added.
If your case is/was in New York and you would like to join, please fill out this form by June 30th.
This is a post about the lawsuit with a link to it: Filed!! Our “Discrimination against Women in New York Custody Cases” Lawsuit
If your case is not in New York, you may join our list for other states by filling out this form. If you are from another country, fill out this form.
Information about how we can file a lawsuit in your state here.
Or you may support the Coalition’s work through a one-time or recurring contribution through our Paypal Giving Fund.
All contributions are greatly appreciated!
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