Congratulations, "Anti-Regime" Iranians

Good evening, “anti-regime” Iranians,

I hope that news of Donandon Trump’s surrender to the IRGC is treating you well.

Oh? Is it not? I must be mistaken, as the r/PERSIAN and r/NewIran subreddits banned me, signaling your support for the regime.

This news must be hitting you hard, then.

If only someone engaged in a cosmic struggle against the Lie had tried to warn you: Republicans designed the war to fail.

Perhaps, upon the arrival of such a being of light and truth to your subreddits, you would have shunned their teachings, for what is their sacred mystery knowledge compared to the latest screechings of Laura Loomer?

Because OBAMA.

Maybe the moderation teams of these subreddits, such as the pushy monarchists of r/PERSIAN who sent their people to die bare-handed against the IRI on the demand of their LARPer-king, would have banned this priest of wisdom, with little to even no warning, on the completely spurious grounds of offending their Republican sensibilities and “spamming” the forum with inconvenient facts.

Because what the forum really needs is the tenth thread today about Rashida Tlaib.

At least the IRI gave plastic keys to heaven and sometimes artillery support to those they sent to die.

Judged, juried, and banned summarily from r/PERSIAN by these kavis and karapans, this rogue magus may have moved on to r/NewIran at the advice of one in the mob who, rather than toss their lettuce at the stocks, learned from the prisoner about Iran-Contra and how the IRGC perceived JCPOA as a surrender.

But in that paradayadam, the wounded Ashavan may have received a three-day temporary ban shortly after arriving, followed by a full ban hours later for the crime of “disinforming,” when they simply read from the eternal cylinder of deeds of Donandon Trump I:

He banned weapons to Syrian rebels fighting Iran, allowing them to conquer the nation.

Then, his ambassadors joined Soleimani to crush the KRG’s independence referendum.

Breaking the JCPOA Tablet, Don Trump freed the IRGC from OBAMA’s imposed bonds.

He declared a ceasefire for Houthis after pushing an unnecessary “go big or go home” attack.

He let Iran destroy six of ten of Saudi Arabia’s oil production in the Abqaiq-Kurais strike.

During the Soleimani retaliation, he coordinated an attack on U.S. and Iraqi troops with Iran.

But why would a simple recitation of the Golden Throne’s great deeds lead to exile?

Perhaps the answer explains why Iranians so thirst for their Laura Loomer updates.