Return/fatigue, take two

Hi everyone! It’s been too long, once again. Please imagine, at this point, a heartfelt apology from me about the recent lack of blogs, and a stirring promise to redouble my efforts going forward. I’ve made both so many times by now that you know all the variations off by heart. (I really do mean it, this time – though I did every other time, too.)

Tomorrow: some good news, regarding someone who really, really deserves it. Sounds like just what you need, right? And then, hot on its heels: two great interviews with poetry pamphlet authors. Stay tuned!

Tonight though, a quick update about what’s been going on since I was last in touch, and a note on the future.

Long-time readers will remember that, in the summer of 2024, I experienced a worsening fatigue condition that affected my eyes. At the time, I wrote what now seems a slightly embarrassing – but stirringly melodramatic – blog about it, saying “something needs to change… I can’t carry on working the way I was before”.

I actually did make several positive changes, and by October 2025 had bounced back to almost full strength, setting a date for new submissions and taking on lots of exciting projects. What I had really done, though, was slip into bad old habits; back into the pattern of “boom and bust”, with periods of dizzying productivity/thrills followed by equal periods of exhaustion and uselessness.

Then, at the start of May… the wheels came completely off, with a vengeance. I was out of action for about six weeks, spending long periods sitting around completely exhausted, eyes refusing to focus for more than five minutes an hour. I shuffled my way around a now-familiar circuit of health professionals, and received the same advice I had 18 months ago: slow down completely, find the absolute minimum sustainable pace, and work back up from there.

It’s so hard, though. To fully accept the identity of ‘person who is ill’, and the diagnosis of ME/CFS, goes against so many of the values that were instilled in me as a child, and a few I have picked up along the way since then. I am someone who gets things done, who makes things happen – but clinging onto this image has had me deluding myself (and as a result, everyone else) with unachievable deadlines; causing inconvenience, anxiety and sometimes outright harm when the inevitable crash followed.

This time, though, I really will learn my lesson. (Lessons always need a couple of goes to stick.) I am taking steps to outsource my remaining screen-heavy work, and I have made the decision to put Valley Press on ‘hiatus’ from spring 2027, pausing the release of new titles for at least nine months. (I realise this may seem a pointless gesture, given that the issue is happening now; but publishing schedules run so far ahead that this decision actually does help immediately.)

In fact, I was toying with the idea of a hiatus even before the fatigue ‘struck back’; I feel a lot has changed lately (in the publishing industry and the world), but also that far bigger and more seismic changes are around the corner. Whether I’m right or not, it will do both me and the business a lot of good to spend some time on the sidelines, off the treadmill, pondering how to sustainably operate a small publishing house in the mid-21st century – then, hopefully, coming back stronger than ever.

In the meantime, thanks to my dizzying efforts last autumn, there are many new Valley Press titles to tell you about, both recently released and forthcoming. I have found my “baseline” of energy, and believe there’s enough for a handful of positive posts in the near future. So, let’s get back to it – see you tomorrow (or later today, if you’re reading on Friday).

(P.S. Thanks to my son for the header image – a dazzling, futuristic and optimistic take on the VP logo.)