Three is Not the Loneliest Number

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(courtesy: @torontotempo)

The decision for Upping the Tempo to come out on Saturday early afternoons was mostly made with you and me in mind. I’d be able to write it (or finish writing it) at a time when I’m generally not working, while still having a chance to enjoy the day, and you would have it as weekend reading. But this week, the timing worked out in my favour in a few other ways.

The first was that Sandy Brondello’s one-game suspension for comments directed at Angel Reese was announced later in the day last Saturday, mere hours after I posted… so it’s old news by now. Very nearly a week old. No point on me commenting on it, really. I’m not being a coward; I’m being all journalistic and considerate of your time!

No need for me to say that I admire Sandy for being able to apologize so profusely when she so clearly had no ill intent, racial or otherwise, in using the seemingly-Australian expression “protected species” to refer to Angel. Or how this was basically the equivalent of a teacher saying, “Your assignment’s on the blackboard,” and one of the students joking, “Oh, so when you’re telling us what to do, it’s a BLACKboard?!”, and then it being repeated to parents as a funny thing from school, and one of them deciding to make a shitstorm, and it getting to the point where the school had to do ‘sweeping under the rug’ damage control. But I also didn’t have to say how an overcorrection might not be a terrible thing in an area where there’ve been decades or even centuries of undercorrection. And how this is actually a demonstration of how cancellation is a myth, because Sandy isn’t paying a huge price and suffered no real reputational damage, and all the people who fearmonger about the possibility of getting cancelled for saying one wrong thing are generally the people who should be cancelled based on their entire body of work.

Really glad I don’t have to say all THAT! Think of all the people I’d have pissed off on both sides!

Also too late to spend much time on – our Monday game against the Aces. Which was also a relief, as it’s a little hard to talk about. Any summary of the game would basically boil down to “They’re just better than us”… and who wants to hear/say that?!

So I get to skip ahead to this weekend’s fun – the All-Star festivities!

And here’s another way that the Saturday afternoon posting time works in my favour – I don’t have to talk about the All-Star Game itself. I get to talk about the Friday night activities, namely the 3-Point Contest and the Shooting Stars Contest.

Even though it’s common knowledge among sports fans, let’s take a second to acknowledge how weird it is that All-Star Games are always the worst part of All-Star Weekends. Now, the WNBA’s is probably better than most, as some players care at least a little… but it’s still kind of lame. Even the best exhibition game is hard to get worked up for, and frankly, in this case, it’s too much.

One thing I’ve come to appreciate going to so many games is that you’ve got your home team and you’ve got your visiting team, usually with two or three big stars. Who’ve developed chemistry and know what they’re doing and how to play together. They’ve got a flavour. Whereas an all-star team is an all-types-of-food buffet. Yeah, it’s got everything you want, but it’s not all going to go together, it won’t all fit on your plate, and it’s undercooked.

Also, though entire volumes could be written about it, I’m going to skip over all the partying and social media shenanigans there’ve been to take in. My logic being that it’s there to be seen if you care, and it could be torture to read about if you don’t. Suffice it to say, the StudBudz ran it back, putting the sisterhood that is the W on full display. And Obama also hung out with the players some, so if you like to escape to an alternate reality of cool and competent commanders-in-chief who can interact with women without making your/their skin crawl, by all means, fuel your imaginations.

My focus, however, is on the Friday competitions. Because, as a rule, they can be fun. For one thing, the contestants decidedly care. The competitive natures that would be lame in the game get their full release here.

Well, nearly. My take on the Shooting Stars Contest is that it was slightly too chaotic to feel intense and the marathon of four-point shots at the end left it feeling like it was too much left in the hands of the Fates. Still, an improvement over the old skills competition – and the framing was sentimental in a good way. Teams consisted of one current WNBA star, one legend of the game, and one high school player, and in the middle of such a historic season, grouping past, present, and future just feels right.

From a Tempo perspective, we once again got to see what we missed out on, as Shakira Austin was on the winning team. Mind you, it certainly didn’t hurt that Team Washington also had Elena Delle Donne… and Jazelle “GG” Banks, the teen who hit multiple four-point shots and made herself a name to remember, at least for me.

But if I know Tempo fans – and at this point, I better! – what we really cared about was the Three-Point Contest. Because that’s where Marina Mabrey was representing us. The first time a Tempo jersey would be seen at an All-Star event… and with a decent chance to win.

This is when I should mention that there was some controversy surrounding the contestants. Basically, the WNBA said that Sabrina Ionescu, Caitlin Clark, and Kayla McBride had all been invited to participate and they’d all declined. That was then denied by two of the three.

McBuckets posted on Instagram, “I received a half-ass invite to the 3 pt contest, thru my agent, in a text randomly 48 hours ago.. not officially.” And at a press conference, Sabrina said, “Never got invited. Whether it’s against Steph Curry or in the W, I always go out and try to beat my record every single time I step onto the court. I take pride in competing at the highest level, and I love representing the Liberty and the league in these contests. I just wanted to set the record straight – that rumor was simply false.”

So, arguably, a field that could’ve been stronger. Ionescu may not be at the top of her game, given the injuries she’s dealt with… but she was still the defending champion, who also set the league record in this event in 2023 with an astonishing 37 points.

Leaving that aside, what we had was an intriguing lineup. In the order they shot: Natisha Hiedeman, the StudBud wildcard; Bridget Carleton, the genial Canadian sharpshooter; Azzi Fudd, just the fourth rookie to compete and one of the prettiest shots in the game; Janelle Salaun, representing all the bench players; Chef, representing, well, us; and Rhyne Howard, one of the league’s most underrated stars.

And here’s how it went down, told very quickly: T looked like the partying might’ve caught up with her, as she pulled an oh-fer on her first rack, and finished with 17. Then BC went off – 4-for-5, 4-for-5, logo shot, 4-for-5, 3-for-5, 5-for-5 for a whopping 29! Azzi followed that up with a cool and collected 24. Salaun fell short with 19… and then it was Chef’s turn. She needed 24 to stay in contention.

She got 18. With a lot of shots rimming out, but that’s how the game goes sometimes. I choose to think the 18 was a shoutout to the Jewish people, the “chai” that isn’t tea. Regardless, she was out… and after putting up 20, so was Rhyne.

At this point, I had to shift my allegiance for the final… and I think I made the choice most Tempo fans would make. It’s hard not to love the People’s Princess AND her shot… but Bridget Carleton is Canadian. She also made her bones on the Lynx, which was my team before the Tempo came along… and I feel bad about how many times I’ve had to say I’m glad we got Marina Mabrey as our expansion draft UFA instead of her. It’s true, but I still feel bad. So it was nice to once again get to be on Team BC.

Naturally, this led to quick disappointment. Shooting first, Azzi was dialed in, making her first six shots and finishing with a score of 30. At that point, BC had to be feeling the pressure… and put up 19. Making Azzi Fudd the first rookie ever to win the W’s Three-Point Contest. And with that, MOST of my interest in All-Star Weekend ended.

I’m now officially rooting for Marina to snag MVP. And if that happens, even though I’ll mostly be focused on REAL games by then, I will give her her flowers, even if it is six days too late!