What if your gut feeling is wrong?

There was this familiar tingling in my belly. Whirling in my chest. Tightness whenever I entered the office.

It was clear - my intuition was telling me it’s high time for a change.

I quit the job trusting fully that the next one will free me from exhaustion and will refuel my heart.

Little did I know at the time that I will end up feeling exactly the same while doing that new “dream” job.

Can you recall that sensation in your body just before an important call? Do you remember how your stomach dropped before you stepped in to the gym for the first time? Or this sweet sensation of lightness when you reunited with your best friend after a long time?

All of those are signals from your body. Whether you are aware of it or not it is sending you messages all day long, every hour, every minute, every second.

These signals reflect whether your body feels safe or in danger in a given moment. The sensations of openness and expansion signal safety, while the heaviness, tightness and collapse lean towards fear. You can think of it as a snapshot in time - a situation, decision to take, anticipation of what is coming reflected in your body language.

Some people call it intuition. The gut feeling.

It’s the whisper that tells you what to do, or what not to do.

Wouldn’t it be brilliant if we could just base all of our decisions on that voice?

It is not as easy as it seems. Oftentimes we are so tired and stressed that anxiety and exhaustion take over the microphone and send disturbing signals regardless of the situation we are in. They shout - Escape! Danger! Run!

After just a couple of years in the corporate world I was completely burned out. If my colleagues at the time would read this statement today, they would most likely be surprised. My 24 year old self would be surprised too.

On the outside it looked like I was living the best life and loving my job. Never complaining, putting in extra hours, taking on additional responsibilities, always with a huge smile on my face. My mind was crafting a narrative based on my body signals.

Taking tightness in my chest for excitement and heaviness in the stomach for passion.

In reality, I was falling apart. Pushing harder than I could, sleeping less than I should, driving my body to the edge of exhaustion.

And at some point, the scream of the body became loud enough to get the attention of the mind. I was getting dizzy, started losing hair and dropping weight. I started noticing constant tiredness. The body was saying - You read it all wrong. It’s bad. You have to get away.

And so I did.

I quit the job and changed careers hoping that this shift will free me from the discomfort.

The problem was that I misread the signals. Instead of seeing the symptoms as a request to slow down, set better boundaries and allow my body to recover, I escaped my environment and… found myself in the exact same state a couple of years later.

I trusted my gut, while I should have had an honest conversation with it first.

How often do you take a breath before you answer a question?

When a request message from your boss at 7pm sends a shiver down your spine, do you read that sensation as:

• It’s my chance to show how committed I am!

• Please don’t, you have already skipped lunch today and we need to rest.

I’d like to invite you to do an experiment with me. Next time you feel rushed to take a decision, stop and ask yourself three questions:

1. What do I sense?

2. What do I feel?

3. What do I think?

The first question is about what is happening in your body. Like tingling, lightness, compression, the metaphorical butterflies in your stomach. Name the sensation and where it’s located - in your belly, feet, chest, throat, jaw?

For me it was like a heavy dark cloud hanging in my chest.

The second relates to feelings - do you feel relaxed, anxious, hopeful, worried, at peace? Don’t judge it, there are no “good” or “bad” feelings.

Back then, at the first thought I would say - I’m excited! But after recognising the cloudy bodily sensation now I know that it was deep anxiety.

And lastly, what is on your mind? I’m not enough. I won’t be able to meet the deadline. I’d love a hot shower.

What I thought was - “I cannot be seen as weak”.

Now, having all that information - check in with yourself about how you feel about the decision? Can you tune into the whirling in your chest to understand if it’s worry or drive? Can you translate it into words and find the meaning between the lines?

The purpose here is to start a conversation with your intuition, rather than allow it to drive all your decisions.

Sometimes, the best decision is stillness.

For years you’ve been driving on an autopilot, taking reactive decisions and then wishing you have taken a breath before saying “yes”.

Now, you have the three questions to break the pattern and recognise what your intuition is telling you. She is not there to take the decisions for you, but is a source of information that you have to analyse. Information that allows change in your own response mechanism, rather than a change of circumstances you are in.

She is your sparring partner and co-pilot, but you are in the driver’s seat.

Thank you for reading until the end.

Big hug,

Zuz