It had been a long day. Normal back to back morning meetings met with an afternoon of last minute pivots and “we need this by end of day” requests. On any other day, this abnormal flow of events at work would have been yes, a lot, but manageable. But today, knowing I had classwork when I got home, the busyness took on new meaning.
Getting home, sitting at the desk, pressing play on my prep course module, I told myself you can do this Traci, you really can. Truth is I was tired, drained and a bit hungry. I pressed pause on the module and stared out the window.
“What am I doing” I thought to myself. “You are single, working, managing a household and now starting a law school journey?”, my thoughts continued as I stared out of my window in front of my desk. It’s sunny out, even though at any moment the sun will begin to set. In that moment while blankly staring at my poorly trimmed tree in the backyard, I had doubt, a lot of it. I began thinking of the totality of what I was taking on. How I am a type A planner and I don’t fully have every detail of the first month of law school fleshed out. Schedules and needs, all to be managed and executed by me.
“Can I do this? Should I do this?” The thoughts kept circling on a loop. The thing is I knew I didn’t have time to let these thoughts fester. I grabbed my phone, typed these thoughts as a note on Substack, put my phone on the shelf and pressed play again on the class module. The screen illuminated and the professor went back to explaining torts.
About two weeks ago that was my day. I think it was a Monday. Real events and doubt. I am often asked in the comments since I have started this Substack, how I plan to do it all.
To be honest, I don’t have an answer
You see, I started this Substack for me. An outlet where I could write freely, where no one knew me. When I seriously decided to pursue going to law school, I thought, “I want to remember this process. I want to keep a log of the ups and downs, the moments of concern and laughter”. I remember starting a blog (outnumberedlove.wordpress.com) years ago when my fourth child was born. I was newly divorced and a new first-time homeowner (literally got the call I was going to closing the day I gave birth to my daughter). At that time my oldest was in middle school, my twins were in 3rd grade, I had a newborn and a new house, all while working full time. So plenty of intersections to blog about.
I so loved writing that blog and back then my life was a new funny sitcom everyday. I always had a funny or ironic story to tell my family. So blogging about it was a joy. Looking back at the blog is what inspired this journey on Substack. I wanted to be able to look back on this season of life and laugh at my days, relive the moments and how monumental they all would have been at the time.
So no, I don’t have it figured out, but also that isn’t the purpose here. The purpose is to pursue a dream I had as a little girl, while continuing to live my big girl life. Learning as I go, walking into the unknown with a little doubt somedays, maybe, but also with resolve and faith knowing that I am not alone. God is guiding my path and opening doors (and closing others) as I follow him.
So, with that context in mind, in all truth and transparency… classes start in 15 days and I am about 80% ready. Here is what I’ve done, the new organization system I am building and what’s left to do. Also sharing a few tips that has helped keep this single mom train moving:
Hooray! It’s finally done. This weekend we finally finished setting up the study café. By we, I mean my dad and my son. Up until now, I had done all I could do as far as updates and designs to the room. The last step was installations. Now old me, meaning Traci in her 30s, would have grabbed the drill and made things happen. This Traci has no interest in being everything, to everybody (including herself) anymore. Instead, I lean on those who can, the willing and able helpers.
Also, I usually keep a running list for my dad with the repairs that are needed around the house that either I can’t get to or want to try and address before I higher someone. At least until my husband finds me (but we won’t go down that rabbit hole).
So here it is:
The goal of the transformation was to provide a cozy and welcoming space for studying, gathering, eating and relaxing. I really want my home to be a place of rest for my family. I want it to feel like a warm hug when you walk in the door. Every room should be functional and inviting. And I really feel like I accomplished that here.
A few before and after shots:
Sectional couch can easily fit the whole family. The table, while still too big, is large enough to spread your books and snacks out. A white board for extra study strategies, a calendar to keep us all on track and plenty of wall space for my daughters art work as she paints throughout the year. This space will also be perfect for our family meetings.
How do I do it all tip #1:
We have family meetings each week to walk through the next week, the needs of each person and their individual schedules. This helps things flow smoothly in our busy home.
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The goal was to prep for the full semester, both breakfast and dinner through pre-made items that would be frozen. While I was able to create the meal plan for the semester, prepping it all was not as easy nor did I have enough space to store it all.
I have about two weeks left before my classes start, so instead of trying to finish it all, I am going to focus on the first few weeks of dinner and either cook and freeze those meals or at least buy the ingredients so they are all here and ready to go. Saving my future self some time from going to the store. Now for those still curious about what I have actually made:
• Kids breakfast burritos
• Sweet potato pancakes
• Salmon croquettes
• Chicken bone broth
• Veggie and Egg Quiche
While not food prep exactly, I have bought kids school snacks for the next month and half, household staples to last until December (paper towels, tissue, laundry detergent, dish soap, A/C filters) and a few pantry staple items as well for the rest of the year (flour, rice, dried beans, chia seeds, sugar). Again, not earth shattering here, but thinking this should save me a trip or a “don’t forget” thought here and there in the future.
How do I do it all tip #2:
If you know it’s a staple in your house or your life, and you can afford it, buy enough of it to last you longer than it’s initial use. The mental load of remembering to buy this or add things to the list gets heavy. Free up that mental space as much as possible.
Now this is nothing fancy and to be honest not fully complete. I spent so much time and budget on the rest of the house, that my room fell to the bottom of the list. I did get the space sectioned off for my office area and I am pleased with that. I still need to add a “refresher station” to my room. So think coffee bar, snack bar, tea bar all combined. The goal is to set it up to have the things I need to refresh me quickly while in class or right before. I know afterwork I will be limited on time and some days I may find myself rushing from the car straight to my desk, so having a set up in my room to make a warm drink or pick me up will be super convenient.
Now as much as I am an old school physical planner, pen and paper note taker, I have to be honest about making the best most efficient use of the time I have. Since I don’t know all that I am walking into, I want to try and set up a tool to help me stay organized and link all the various areas of my life in one place. While I still plan to use my planner outnumberedlife.com, I want to implement this new process and see if it helps more in this new season.
Now I am extremely new to Notion, I mean like 1 week new. But from what I have read, I feel this will be a great place to house what I am looking for. I am still building the dashboard, with the help of Youtube and the tool’s AI agent, but thinking of sharing the template I land on once it’s cleaned up a bit. My goal is to have one place to look each morning that spells out my day and obligations. So we will see if I get there.
How do I do it all tip #3:
Spend time learning what helps you stay organized, then go all in on that. Finding a way to keep your life organized can only help you. Even if in a small way, it’s worth it.
Now that my prep course is complete, I am taking the next two weeks to mentally relax. As a single working mom, that is going to look different. For me that means sleeping in past 6am on weekends, watching Tv some week nights and I might try and get one day of binge watching in. I have to admit, it is VERY hard for me to turn my brain off and do nothing. There is always something to do here, but I will definitely make a concerted effort over these next few weeks.
Class schedule has been received and book order placed. I do have some equipment I need to buy for my office area like a better camera, the one on my laptop isn’t the best, a speaker or a headset with a mouth piece and then eventually a better desk chair. Although now that I think of it, I should get that chair when I get everything else. Comfortable seating is a non-negotiable.
Ok, well I think that brings us up to date. This week the kids start school. I am so thankful they start 2 weeks before I start. This gives us all time for them to get back into their routine before my availability changes.
Looking forward to sharing more updates soon!
Until Next Time,
Traci
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