Fire Horse Intensity and Every Day Fears

Aloha reading ‘ohana,

I thought I better check in quick since January flew by and February, although shorter, promises to be a busy and exciting month, which includes Chinese New Year celebrations that begins on February 17th.

Growing up in Honolulu, where much of the Chinese population—including my grandfather—immigrated from parts of Canton (Guandong), we always wished our family and friends luck and prosperity by saying Gung Hey Fat Choy in Cantonese. (I never heard the Mandarin Gong Xi Fa Cai until I moved to the mainland.)

Health, love, happiness? Those are great too. But the number one wish for Chinese New Year was always for fortune and luck.

Luck must have played a part in my new book because, although I didn’t plan to align with the Fire Horse, I couldn’t have picked a better zodiac animal for the release of my Hawaiian cowboy mystery-thriller, HAWAI‘I RAGE. The book launch is three months away, but I already wish I had a fast steed with paniolo skills to match in order to keep up.

The horse energy brings action, freedom, and intensity. Fire increases the passion. It’s a time for breakthroughs and momentum. But we also need the flexibility and suppleness to keep hold of our seat.

Chinese New Year is still a week away and I’ve already been reminded that I need to be mindful if I hope to survive the intensity, action, and high-speed momentum a Fire Horse year can bring.

But the Fire Horse year is about more than speed.

Susan Gu, a traditional Chinese medicine practitioner and acupuncturist at the HVN in London, explained in Vogue, “A Horse year is not about running the fastest but running the longest. The Horse is not afraid of slowness, it’s afraid of stillness.”

So my personal wish for this year is to ride the fire horse energy with passion and courage, while at the same time taking care of myself physically and emotionally so I don’t burn out.

This is a year for massive creative growth, risks, and professional leaps. It might be scary at time, but if we relax in the saddle and meld with the fire horse energy, I think we’ll be fine.

And speaking of good fortune, check out this early praise from a USA bestselling author of contemporary western thrillers. So glad I passed his authenticity test!

As I mentioned earlier, this month has already reminded me about the importance of self care. We all know this, right? But it’s really easy to forget, especially when we’re stressed or lulled into complacency by our general strength and good health.

I had barely passed through the first week when I was reminded how important vocal health is for audiobook narration. I know it’s obvious, but it’s also easy to take for granted when you’re talking effortlessly throughout the day. Narrating an audiobook is far more demanding on your voice (and concentration) than chatting with and singing to my grandkids, that’s for sure!

With my debut narration for KAUA‘I STORM, I practice-recorded every chapter (often several times) at home over the course of ten days to prepare and build my stamina for the five straight days of narrating in a recording studio with my director and engineer. Since it was my first time narrating an audiobook, I crept into it slowly and carefully—ever conscious that my experiences as a voiceover artist and actor might not apply.

This time, I dove in with careless exuberance, lulled into believing I could repeat the process that had worked so well for me before. But here’s the thing…

Repeating what has worked in the past is not always appropriate, necessary, or smart.

Not surprisingly, I strained my voice, which—as it often happens with me—led to a fully congested, throat-aching cold. Argh!!! I know better than this. I used to sing on theater stages and in clubs. I’ve recorded songs and voiceover tracks in studios. I know the importance of warming up my vocal chords before making demands. I also know when I should stop. So what happened?

Fear of failing drove me to push harder than I should.

Exuberance wasn’t the only catalyst to my negligent choices. Like many creatives, I was riddled with doubt.

What if I couldn’t find my narrating voice? What if the characters didn’t sound real? What if I couldn’t narrate this audiobook as well as the one before? I knew I should take a break, but I worried I wouldn’t have enough time to prepare.

Sound familiar?

I face the same kinds of fear as a writer almost every day.

Every creative person I know wrestles with the same demons. No matter how successful they are or how many blockbusters they’ve written or produced, there is always that niggling doubt—or paralyzing terror! —that they won’t be able to do it again.

It’s not an idle fear. After all, many creatives don’t.

And yet, the ones still at it persist. They—me included—remind ourselves we have faced and overcome these fears with every new book. If we did it before, the chances are in our favor that we will be able to do it again.

The remedy for today’s bout of fear is often found in yesterday’s success.

So, I put away my narrating fears, stowed my microphone and headphones, and gave my voice a much-needed break. Meanwhile, I’ve been re-evaluating the best way for the author-narrator I am today to prepare to narrate this particular book.

And that’s the big take-away reminder I gained from this week.

Lean on what worked in the past, but remain fluid enough to greet each new challenge with fresh eyes. It’s an apropos lesson for the Year of the Fire Horse, don’t you think?

I have four more days to prepare for my first day in the studio. Wish me luck!

You can read about my debut narrating adventures in Experiences of an Author Hired to Narrate Her Own Book.

If you read and loved my Ranger Makalani Pahukula family drama mystery and are searching for another immersive authentically Hawaiian story, I have two new books/audiobooks to recommend while you wait for HAWAI‘I RAGE. Both are beautifully voiced by Hawai‘i-born narrators.

THE SHARK HOUSE by Sara Ackerman (narrated by Jennifer Robideau) is a gorgeous women’s fiction mystery about marine biologist Minnow Gray, who is brought back to Hawai‘i Island to uncover the reason behind recent white shark attacks. What makes this book so special is the care and authenticity with which Hawai‘i-born author Sara Ackerman writes. Her deep love for our Hawaiian people and culture radiates on every page. You will feel the spiritual connection between the Native Hawaiians and manō (sharks).

On a personal note, Sara is the elder sister of one of my Punahou School friends! She is the bestselling author of nine contemporary or historical novels set in Hawai‘i. Check them out!

THE PŌHAKU by Jasmine ‘Iolani Hakes (narrated by Jolene Jaxon) is a magical realism historical novel with a dual timeline in contemporary Honolulu. This is a delicious book with rich characterization, sweeping history, and myth. Jasmine’s debut novel, HULA, was one of my favorite reads last year. They are quite different. I encourage you to investigate them both and read or listen to whichever grabs you first.

While our grandkids celebrate Chinese New Year in Hong Kong with their mom’s family, my husband and I will be flying to San Francisco to visit with my sister’s family while attending Left Coast Crime. This more intimate crime fiction/mystery conference is always a blast.

In addition to my “All in the Family” panel on Thursday, February 26—which plays nicely with my multigenerational family themes—I also look forward to casual conversations with old and new writer and reader friends.

If you’re registered for the conference, be sure to sign up for my Author-Reader Connection on Saturday, February 28 to receive an advanced reader copy of HAWAI‘I RAGE and talk story about Hawai‘i with me.

Until next time, my friends, wishing you all the best in the new year.

Aloha,
Tori 🌺