“What have you tried?”

Early on, I picked up the habit of checking with him when some technical thing or other wasn’t working the way I expected: “I can’t connect to the thingamabob :(” “The whatchamacallit isn’t working :(” “How do I fix the doohickey?” etc. Without fail, James’s response would be not an answer but a question, one that has shaped my thinking ever since: What have you tried? I just stuck that on post it…