my liege should never deign to apologize for anything, so i shall on your behalf: im sorry mothers. in a conciliatory gesture i shall ceremoniouosly cast myself into the pit of massive carnivorous snakes for its their time to feed … and i have never mothered anything so it wont seem hypocritical to the eyes of the masses. my liege.

nodding gravely and solemnly. your magnanimous sacrifice is approved and appreciated by the liegedom and you shall be venerated as a local god, say hi to the banyue snakes for us 🫡 also hey maybe the goobers won't eat you today if we've fed them before the sacrifice