This is a letter for you, Dad

It's been four years since I talked to you. I wonder if you would still be here if I had paused my life and put all my energy into helping you get back on your feet. Confused about my own life's purpose, I didn't dare to imagine a life without you. I thought you would return to being the father I knew, just as you had after the first big surgery. You were in pain for several years, and all I had…