How to Read an "AI" Press Release

Every so often someone like Mark Zuckerberg or Sam Altman will dribble out some unadorned text, announcing with stentorian certitude the advent of a new world that their latest product will avail. Zuck seems to love dressing up his thought bubbles in Times New Roman for the purposes of LARPing intellect, which I find funny and tragic. I take an interest in this genre of bad copy not only because…