I Stole One Lava Lamp From Cloudflare HQ. 11 Timelines Collapsed.

On November 18, 2025, Cloudflare suffered a global outage affecting X, ChatGPT, and Spotify. But it wasn't just Timeline Ω-12. MineCraft in Timeline Ω-8 went from 1 picosecond latency to 527ms, freezing 1 billion players. Timeline Ω-11 lost $666 million in payments. 11 timelines collapsed. They blamed 'unusual traffic.' I know the real cause: I took one lava lamp from their entropy wall three…