do i love my anxiety? Valuing my time

Sometimes I wonder if living with anxiety means that the only time I really feel alive is when I feel like something is trying to kill me. Not in a "daredevil" kind of way - I'm actually extremely risk-averse in basically most areas of my life. But in a "if I can't feel my anxiety, how do I know I'm still breathing?" kind of way. Living with anxiety sucks. It means that at any moment you can be…