Yesterday my HOONIGAN shirt arrived, and I was stoked to show it off. I thought if I popped across the street to WestArt’s Art Bar for a coffee, some cool cat would stop me and be like:
Dude! No way. Your shirt’s dope. Pastrana’s Gymkhana Aussie Shred video is nuts!
Instead, the young lady who took my money for coffee came up behind me silently where I was writing on my MacBook trying to be noticed. I felt a gentle finger at the top of my neck and heard her whisper, as if to a dear old man:
Your tag is still on your shirt.
For a split second I felt embarrassed. I thanked her, reached up, and yanked it off, convincing myself to laugh it off.
Not a few seconds later, a young guy walks past me, turns, and is like:
Dude! Nice shirt!
What then commenced can only be described as a manic, fanboy volley of all things Subaru, rally racing, and Travis Pastrana that lasted for ten minutes.
We spoke of the BRAT video, of course: A choreographed short film of car stunts shot in Australia. I’ve included it for you, don’t you fret none. If watching it doesn’t elevate your pulse, make you giddy as a school boy, or elicit protestations of recklessness, you may be a soulless chat bot.
BRAT stands for “Bi-drive Recreational All-terrain Transporter.”
For years I’ve been touting the merits of the little “truck” Subaru produced from 1978-1994. For as many years I’ve been a voice crying out in the wilderness with the exception of, oh, I don’t know…Ronald Regan who drove one around his California ranch in retirement.
To avoid a “chicken tax” on light truck imports Subaru placed two plastic seats in the bed, facing backward. (It looks like Ron’s Irish Setter requested the removal of said chairs). I mention them because they figure into today’s video. Just you wait.
A few years back, I found out that extreme mountain bike aerial artist (for that is truly what he is) Brandon Semenuk decided he wasn’t cool enough, so he got a BRAT for hauling his bikes. My hunch is that his rally team mate Travis got the bug from him. Or maybe they both caught it from me because I’ve always known what is cool. Don’t even get me started about my three Chevy Corvairs.
Of course, there are naysayers for every nearly perfect piece of engineering or design. As Barry, a former owner once growled at me, “BRATS? Ha! Them cars ain’t got no power.”
OK, Barry, so what’s your point? And have you seen Travis’s video?
To be fair, the BRAT in the film is a ground-up creation by Vermont SportsCar, the same rad folk who build rally cars out of WRX’s. Their BRAT is the Godzilla version of your nephew Jeremy’s iguana.
I should mention that Aaron, the guy in the coffee bar who knew more about Subarus than me, was also the boyfriend of Jack, the girl who pointed out my shirt tag. She had recognized its graphics too, being a fan girl of such motor sports, but didn’t let on, preferring to save me a little embarrassment.
Oh, how it feels to be seen!
I’ve made you wait long enough. Enjoy the video. I recommend headphones or the largest screen possible.
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