a collection of poems

i dyed my hair black
to be less seen
and orange to be visible
neither changed anything
other than the illusion
that only my looks
were the problem

we’re counting the pieces of pain
playing dominoes with our hearts
till one falls between us
we are creatures in our own eyes
and angels in each other’s

the flame we imagined
between us
was never more than a spark
we chose to watch
through a lens

i wish you could hear
the way my chest cramps
how you threw me from the sky
down into the deepest abyss
the way you broke my hands
and asked me to create myself
from the ashes you left

i greet my shadow
as if i don't know
every outline of it

i see you across the lights
please pull me in with your hand
so i don’t drown in the crowd
make me feel seen
before i lose you
between the colorless stripes

hold up, hold up,
why am i writing again
wasn’t i happy a moment ago
where did this feeling go?
did i trust the crumbs left
to be more than they were?

walking on this path
where are you
there are outlines
of what i want you to be
shadows standing next to me
a sketch i can't finish
until we meet

white candles burning in the distance
a light smell of calmness

where is my mind?
nothing more left
than an ocean full of thoughts

i’m sinking
drowning in the familiarity
of my own room

nothing else left
than the bittersweet memories
taking out pieces from whats still left

a slow death
after failed rebirth

is it this life
or my own being missing the solution?

no saint,
no psychic,
no love or hate
can free me
from the cage of my own mind

feel free to write your own continuation to any of these poems and tag me - i’d love to read it.

Thank you for reading.

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