pages from my journal

i write a lot that never makes it here or anywhere. and its not because it isn’t worth sharing, but because a thought doesn’t need to become an essay. sometimes i just want to write it down exactly as it came to me. so, every now and then, i’m going to share a page from my journal here. no thesis. no perfectly constructed argument. no trying to tie everything back to a larger point. just something i was thinking about. something i noticed. something i’m trying to understand. maybe something i haven’t figured out yet. consider this a little less polished, a little more personal.

welcome to the pages i usually keep to myself.

— n

just a little context: i started The Artist’s Way about a year ago, and opening my journal to this particular assignment brought me back to a place i’m really grateful for. if i remember, week 10 was the week i struggled with the most. i think i redid it twice, if not three times, before finally moving on to week 11. looking back at what i wrote then feels a little surreal. i can see where i was, what i was wrestling with, and maybe even some of the things i hadn’t quite figured out yet.

so, here’s that page.

typed transcription of the entry

Artists way week 10: struggle

I am currently on week 10, ending week 10 of the artists way and one of my recap questions was: “were there any other issues this week that you consider significant to your recover?” and yes there are. I am currently working so much. almost full time. I love my job, but I hate the repeated cycle of doing the same thing. thats why I ran away from a job for so long. I burn out easily when things get repetitive. with working so much I dont have time to myself, and with that, I dont have much time for my creativity, my dog, my friends, etc. morning pages have become harder and I dont like that because I enjoyed it the most throughout this course. im trying to sleep to the last minute so im not exhausted but then have no time to eat, do my pages, or just quietly exist :( I miss quietly existing.