You can’t plan and space out big life events perfectly, though this past week I wish I’d had a little more control over the timing. So many things collided at once, the kind that are tough on the nervous system, especially if you’re someone like me who gets anxious and stressed easily. All of it is good. Great, even. Just a lot!
In one ten-day stretch: my debut coloring book came out into the world, which on one hand feels like I have done this before but also feels like brand-new territory for me. My younger son, Theo, graduated from one of the biggest high schools in the country, which sounds simple until you realize the ceremony was at Barclays Center, which meant downloading the Brooklyn Nets app for tickets, navigating stadium-level crowds, and dealing with first-come, first-served seating at a school where a lot of parents, myself included, think their kid is the best and just want a clear shot of the stage where they all walk.
On top of that, my older son, Ian, came home to our 1,250-square-foot apartment with a massive pile of stuff: camera gear, clothes, the cat Rocky’s things, his girlfriend, who is fully part of our family now, plus her stuff too. Those two were about to leave for two and a half months, him to France and her to Singapore, and our place was their jumping-off point. We have Miss Rocky the cat while they are away.
The chaos at home is always hard for me. I’m a minimalist, I don’t love clutter, but when you’ve got five people and a cat under one roof, two of them packing for a long trip abroad, clutter is just what’s happening. Having everyone home is amazing and always too brief. I want to savor every minute, but I catch myself fighting the mess instead, having to remind myself, I’ll be sad when they’re gone. It’s just stuff.
Add to that Ian’s twenty-second birthday, which he celebrated en route to France, my mother’s birthday, my father’s birthday, Father’s Day-times-three for the dads in our lives, and yes, in case I buried the lead, my coloring book also came out this week.
And then there’s another big one: Theo moving his things out of my studio so he can create out on Long Island, where he is spending the summer working before university. We set him up at my studio a few years ago, when his art making got too big for our apartment, and having him there with me has been one of the real joys of these last few years. He’d come by most days after school, and on weekends we’d work side by side on completely different projects, texting about who would grab coffee on the way over. It’s been the closest thing I’ve experienced to that garage or basement communal creative space people talk about, except ours is ten blocks from home instead of down the stairs.
I said to a friend, in the middle of all this, that so much of the overload is just in my mind. I’ll be honest, when I actually break it down, coordinating the graduation was manageable. The book is finished, and whatever I did or didn’t do during launch week, it’s going to find its own way, like every book does. I can celebrate it next week or next month and it’ll be just as real. Moving Theo out of the studio is really just a few hours breaking things down and loading a car, packing some tools, draining the oil out of his sewing machine. Ian was loving and gracious sharing his birthday with his brothers graduation, and arrived in France safe and sound. It’s the weight of the milestones, the sense of time and change, that makes it feel like too much. Time and change have always been hard for me. Throw in a book launch, a handful of other things, compounding it all in one short stretch, and it’s a lot, but it’s also just a season I can move through. I’ve done it before.
My sketchbook could be filled twice over with all of this material, but instead I’ve been squeezing in drawing time on my iPad as I work on the next book, another coloring book that is all about New York City. Trying to create in the middle of Knicks playoff energy and all the New York pride in the air has been its own kind of fun. What a time for all of us to be here in the city, even though the parade landed on the same day as the graduation so that we couldn’t make it to both.
School—the kind where my kids come home every day—is officially over. The empty nest is looming and I don’t feel ready for it. Both of my kids are fully grown, fully formed adults now, with a whole life of New York City in them. They have so much ahead, even with creative careers that are unknown and unpredictable. They’ll figure it out, the same way my husband and I did.
All is good. All is great. And it feels good to just write it all out.
Next week I am celebrating Color Your World virtually with my friends and paid subscribers on Zoom. I would love to have more people join, even if you are not able to be a paid supporter at this time, so if you would like the link to join, please send me a message or leave a comment below!
And my next demo and workshop with paid subscribers is all about drawing and painting citrus fruits. Links to all events are shared in the subscriber chat.
If you’d like to try out Blackwing pencils or just order some new items, please shop using this unique link: blackwing602.com/sdionbaker. When you purchase using my link, there’s no additional cost to you, and I earn a small commission. I appreciate your support!
All products from Art Toolkit are 10% off with my discount code: SDIONBAKER10
All Canvas lights and accessories are 10% off with my discount code: SDB10.
All of my books can be found here.
All of my Skillshare classes can be found here. And you can watch my Skillshare Studio Tour here.
Comments
Nothing yet. Say the first thing.
Sign in to join the conversation.