Reading · Rob Gray's Area

AMES (Mary Greeley) and DES MOINES (Iowa Lutheran) — I froze up as my dad seemed to be crashing out.

Dad was thrilled to leave Iowa Lutheran (where he got great care) last weelend. Kristi Gray photo.

His vital signs, haywire. The beeps in his hospital room, loud, incessant, alarming, cruel. Henry Gray’s life was in danger and there was nothing I, his son, could do about.

I didn’t panic. I didn’t feel fear. I felt a strange blend of calmness and dread as I consciously drew in deep, nervous breaths. Control what you can control, right?

Dad almost died that recent day, but now he’s home. His infection, healed. His necessary (and infected) stent, removed and replaced. He’ll need to replace that one in about three months. It may or may not become infected, too. Such is life for an 87-year-old man I love and admire who’s dealing with cancer.

He needs help. To get up. To use a portable commode. To sit down. My sister, Kristi, is doing yeowoman’s work in this area. Mom, Janet, is a huge help, as well. I’m doing what I can, but nothing seems like it’s enough when the man who changed my diapers (along with mom), clothed, fed and housed me (along with mom), and gave me financial and emotional support anytime I needed it (along with mom) my entire life is struggling.

Roles are reversed. Diapers now cradle the other tush. I don’t freeze up, but I do feel like crashing out myself.

I’m not prepared for this, but control what you can control, right? Deep breaths through the nose. Get work done. Manage things. Try not to think about the end that’s coming. An eventual move to hospice. I know I’ll explode into tears at some point and I’m not sure how I’ll stop their flow. Life meets death — and they look a lot alike.

But I have lots to be thankful for. Dad almost died. He’s alive and alert, sense of humor in tact. We played cards tonight and his trademark good luck came alive, as usual, while I languished. I didn’t enjoy that, but I smile now. Dad is still with us. We must cherish our remaining time with him. And when it’s time to say goodbye, we will do so with grace and love. What more is there in life? And death? We can choose to be our best selves, where love reigns supreme, and childlike curiosity and wonder can summon awe. It’s a miserable yet transcendent state of being.

This was under the cap of my organic iced tea bottle right after dad came home. Fitting. Photo by me.

I’m here for it. Love you, dad.

Sorry for the short post, but it’s been a lot. Also, please find the introductory paragraphs of my recent feature on talented Iowa State guard Leon Bond III, who transferred in from Northern Iowa — my dad’s alma mater. Thanks, as always, for reading, sharing, and subscribing. Your support means the world to me — both here and at Cyclone Fanatic and The Cedar Rapids Gazette.

So on to Bond … Leon Bond:

AMES — He’s athletic. He’s an elite defender. And he delights in putting in the unglamorous work on the court.

Suffice it to say, then, that transfer guard Leon Bond III checks all the boxes for Iowa State men’s basketball head coach T.J. Otzelberger, who expects the former Northern Iowa standout to make a big impact on the Cyclones’ 2026-27 season.

“He’s got unbelievable spirit, he’s got a big smile on his face, he brings energy to the floor every single day, and enthusiasm, passion for the game, a gratitude to be here,” Otzelberger said of the 6-5 Bond, who averaged 11.9 points and 4.7 rebounds while shooting 36.2 5 from 3-point range last season. “There’s really nothing in this game that Leon Bond isn’t capable of doing.”

The confident and experienced Bond’s well aware of all that — and eager to unlock his high-end potential. Want proof? Here’s how the soon-to-be senior describes himself as a player:

“I feel like I bring athleticism, of course,” Bond said. “I feel like I bring defensive versatility. I would say offensively I bring a little bit of everything — a little Swiss Army knife.”

READ MORE at Cyclone Fanatic and at The Gazette (paywalled).

I’m SO PROUD (nod to Paul Rhoads) to be a member of the Iowa Writers’ Collaborative. Please peruse the illustrious and extensive list below and subscribe and support as you’re able. Thanks!