Recently, an important chapter of my life came to an end. After many years in my YPO forum, I aged out, along with several other long-term members.
For those unfamiliar, a forum is a small group of peers, often entrepreneurs or executives, who meet regularly to support each other through challenges and opportunities in a confidential setting. I have written before about the value of these groups, which essentially function as a personal board of directors.
Ours had been together for many years and was one of the longest standing in our chapter.
Our final meeting was emotional, as expected. As we each shared our last personal updates with the group, it became clear nearly everyone was in the middle of some kind of transition. There were new business and career opportunities, roles ending, kids leaving home, and relationships evolving. Some of these changes were chosen, others were not.
Listening to those updates, I noticed a pattern: every story about something exciting beginning started with something else ending. Doors opened and closed for people at the same time.
Doors close in one of two ways. Either they close on you, or you close them yourself.
The door that closes on you always stings more in the moment. A rule changes, a client moves on, or a season of life ends on someone else’s schedule, and you are left in a transition you did not choose. However, unexpected opportunities can often follow, not unlike how a forest regenerates after a fire.
Closing the door yourself is harder because it means giving up something that still works. It’s trading good for the chance at great. Most of us are willing to make a change when things are clearly bad or our hand is forced: a draining job, a failing business, a broken partnership. It’s harder to end things that are still working fine. When something is comfortable and still delivering some value, closing that door feels unnecessary and scary. So, we keep it propped open, sometimes for years, without noticing the hidden costs.
None of this is to say we should abandon commitments the moment they stop being exciting. Persistence matters, and many of the best things in life only materialize after years of showing up and putting in the work. While you shouldn’t quit everything that feels stale, you should at least ask whether you’re keeping a door open because it still leads somewhere, or simply because closing it feels too final.
My own update was a mix of both. I realized that some of the doors that were closing on me pushed me toward an opening that had been circulating in my head for a year but that I had been hesitant to pursue. I am not always good at objectively evaluating whether my long-term commitments still make sense for what I want today and bring me fulfillment.
As our meeting wrapped up, what struck me most was that no one in the room was lamenting. The same people describing things that were ending were also excited about what was coming next. The endings and the beginnings weren’t in conflict; one was making room for the other.
Graduating on a high note, with gratitude, felt like the right way to honor what we had built, trusting that a new door would open as a result.
Just like in a book, every new chapter begins after the last page of the one before it. If there’s a door in your life you’ve been holding open out of habit, or out of fear of what comes next, it may be worth asking what could open once you are finally willing to close it.
Quote of the Week
“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” – Semisonic
Have a great weekend!
-Bob
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