I've sold hundreds of thousands of books, but I've never hit a bestseller list

If you’re an author, there are just a couple of benchmarks that seem to really matter: becoming a USA Today bestseller or a New York Times bestseller.

After my debut, Not Her Daughter, came out back in 2018, I checked those lists religiously. I just knew I would be on them. My book was buzzy, I was a debut, and my publishers were confident! When I heard that I’d only sold around 1500 copies that first week (which my publishers were thrilled about), I was crushed. Yes, we sold out of our first print run almost immediately and continued to sell so well that they created a special edition book, followed by a mass market edition, but all of those sales didn’t come within the first week.

They came over time.

To hit these coveted lists, you need to sell between 5,000-7,000 copies (sometimes more, sometimes less) from certain reporting bookstores and online sales during one week. (And contrary to popular belief, you can hit these lists outside of the first week or two of sales.)

I remember about a week after my book came out, almost everyone I ran into would ask: “Have you hit the bestseller list yet?”

Now, I do consider myself a bestselling author. I’ve hit #1 in numerous categories, local bookstores, Apple bestseller lists, Amazon, Target bestseller, Barnes & Noble…

But after nine novels and eight years down this path, I still have not hit USA Today or New York Times.

Even after selling 25,000 copies of a book in the first month. Or 30,000… It’s like the stars just haven’t lined up for all those sales to magically happen within seven days from the proper reporting bookstores.

And if I’m being honest, this makes me feel like shit. Or a failure. Or a little bit of both.

How can I possibly help people become bestsellers if I haven’t done it myself?

Even though if I google myself, it says otherwise.

Is it possible I could have hit the list and my publishers not known? Sure, I guess. This actually happened to a friend of mine. Her book, years later, hit the list randomly, and her publisher didn’t even know! A random person reached out to share the news.

But I have no way of going back to search through all the archives back when I started.

What is my point here?

While I don’t chase lists, when you hit one, it’s proof that you are recognized enough to feel legitimate as a writer.

It’s validation. It opens doors. It matters… right?

I’ve watched nearly all my author friends hit these coveted lists. I’ve helped countless nonfiction authors become New York Times and USA Today bestsellers… on their first book! When they’ve never written anything before!

Does this sting?

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT REALLY, REALLY DOES!!!!!!!!

And you know what’s funny?

I have outsold a lot of them.

But no matter how much I sell, if all the magical math stars don’t line up, I’m not included on those lists. Used to, hitting those lists really mattered. Now I know authors who hit them and they literally cannot get another book deal because publishers say they haven’t “sold” enough.

What?!

Let me explain.

Let’s say you hit USA Today and you sold 5,000 copies in that first week… That’s amazing! But then? You might go on to hardly sell any more copies after that first week or two. Sales fizzle, your publisher support evaporates, and you move on to the next book. Other authors have longer sales tails and continue to sell steadily but don’t hit those lists. (Yep. Hi. It’s me again.)

I know so many authors in my exact same camp. So are we less than because we haven’t hit a list?

In my opinion, I wish we’d stop waving around these accolades as if they are truly the only benchmark of a great book or why you should even buy a book in the first place. (Raise your hand if you’ve read a bestseller and thought, "OMG, my book is so much better than this!”) ✋✋✋

Or is that just me?

Perhaps I haven’t hit the list because I feel like it eludes me. Every book I write, I think, “Okay, this will be the one!” Though for my last three books with Amazon, it’s very hard to hit any list because so many of your sales come from Kindle. And you cannot hit the NYT.

But you know what I just found out?

Indie published authors are now hitting NYT and USA Today lists all the time. And people are actually buying their way onto these lists, paying anywhere from $60,000-$200,000 just to say they are bestsellers.

Why are we so obsessed with hitting these lists?

An industry expert recently told me that your Amazon ranking is now more important than hitting any bestseller list—because your Amazon rank truly shows you how many books you’re selling.

While the industry might say otherwise, I tend to agree.

Would it be nice to hit a list? Fuck yes. I have imagined it so many times and WHEN it happens, I will appreciate it so much more now than I would have at any other time in my career.

Because now I realize it’s just a moment. It will come and go, just like every big win. It’s not the destination. It’s just part of this wild ride.

I’ve also realized that it’s just not my time yet. If everything always worked out perfectly for me, I’d have nothing to teach my clients. Nothing to share.

Nothing to truly appreciate, because I’d have nothing to compare it against.

(This is my story and I’m sticking to it.)

Right at this moment, it’s more about growing my readership than hitting a list. (More on that soon, for all of us who loathe social media.) I just want as many books in as many hands as I possibly can.

So tell me: What really matters to you as an author? (Or even a reader?) Is it hitting a list or is it something else? Do you buy your books based on who is a bestseller and who isn’t?

Let’s chat.

Rea