EIGHT other authors told me the exact same thing happened to them.

Last week, I shared the news about my breakup with my publisher.

There was the brief email my editor sent to my agent, which signaled the abrupt (and impersonal) end of a three-year relationship, and the sudden reality of being without a publisher for the first time since 2018.

Now, while I love being honest, it’s always super vulnerable to share news like this.

It’s embarrassing to admit that you didn’t sell enough books for your publisher to keep you.

But once I hit publish on last week’s post?

I was floored by the response.

As the comments and messages flooded my inbox, Instagram, and the post itself, my jaw hit the floor. In a matter of days, eight other authors reached out to me privately to tell me the same thing had happened to them.

With my exact same editor.

Say what?!

I listened to so many similar stories outside of those eight authors too. And I realized there is this sense of helpless “waiting” that tends to occur with traditional publishing. Or the promise of something great… only to later be dropped or ignored.

Now, I’m not saying this is everyone’s experience with traditional publishing. I have literally been treated like gold by different teams for individual books during the course of my career. However, when you write more books and have more expectations, your team can sometimes be less enthusiastic than they were when they signed you.

Because for them, there’s always a shiny new author waiting in the wings. If you don’t “perform” the way they want you to, someone else can pick up the slack. If you’re not a lead title, you fall into that midlist slump, and it can feel impossible to figure your way out. And up.

So.

Whenever you enter this world—whether on submission for an agent or waiting for a book deal—the questions abound.

Will I be chosen?

When will I be chosen?

My book is good enough… so why am I not hearing back?

Wait… is my book good enough?

How much money will I get?

Will my book blow up?

What if I don’t get chosen… THEN WHAT?!?

If you decide you want to be an author, SO VERY MUCH is up in the air. Almost nothing is guaranteed. (What a great business we’re in… amirite?)

Which is why it is VITAL to know just how long you are willing to wait “to hear back” and what you will do if no one chooses your book. Or, in my case, if a publisher decides they want to move on.

Because a publisher walking away has real ramifications. When you are looking for a new publishing home, that team will review your most recent sales, and if they deem it didn’t sell well enough either?

Well, then they might just say, no thank you.

The past few days I’ve wondered what it would feel like to not wait for months on end for an editor to read my book, to not wait for a publisher to tell me what my book is worth, to not wait 12 to 18 months to see that book hit the shelves.

But if we don’t wait, then what can we do?

This system is built to literally keep us waiting in isolation and self-doubt, without much say so in how our work is received.

Herein lies the conundrum. We want to take control of our destiny, but so many of us think that destiny must come through a bad ass literary agent or a humongous book deal.

The alternative (self-publishing) just feels like a whole mountain of work, and either way, you have to connect with your readers right? You still have to market your book. You still have to build an author platform. How do you even do that if you’ve never published a single book?

I’ve been on all sides of this business.

I see dreams come true every single day. I’ve helped hundreds and hundreds of first-time authors make their goals a reality. I’ve also seen really great books NOT get picked up. I’ve seen authors give up, or pivot, or try something else out of frustration—seemingly forced to try a new path.

The publishing industry is built on dichotomies. Your wildest dreams can come true… or not. You can be chosen… and then dumped. You can be a great success… until your next book. You feel so important… until you’re not.

Like anything, dreams have a reality, and a flip side, which can leave you feeling confused.

And yet…

There is always going to be a next book, a next decision, and a next step in your career.

I know so many authors right now who are getting dropped, or can’t get a deal, or are leaving their agents, or getting offered less money, or pivoting to a more hybrid approach of both traditional and indie publishing.

So, what’s the right answer for you?

Just as I guide my book doula clients, I always ask these few questions up front:

1. Do I need/want to see my book in bookstores? (And the deeper question: Where are readers actually buying books? Does my ego want my book in a bookstore, or do I just want my books available where readers are buying them?)

2. When do I want my book to come out? (Are you willing to wait up to 2 years to see your book on a shelf or do you want it out in six months?)

3. Am I willing for my book to change? (Traditional publishing means many hands touch your book. Your book will change, often dramatically, so if you love your story as is, then the traditional path is most definitely not for you.)

The answers to these questions can help guide your path.

And if you’re still unsure, let’s have a chat. I’m here to help.

All I know is that, for me, this breakup is a total gift. Because of it, I am branching out and trying something completely new while still keeping my foot in the traditional world too.

I am simply no longer willing to have ZERO control around the outcome of my books. So I’m stepping up in a new way… and will be sharing that journey along the way. (More to come soon.)

I’d love to hear where you are in your creative process and what your biggest struggle might be.

Because chances are, you are most definitely not alone.

I know I’m not, thanks to all of you.

Rea