Live Long and Prosper...

I note a little of Granny Tetsuyo Ishii each night, and her words float out of the pages of her book as if she sits opposite me – that gentle face in which, strangely, I see my own western grandmother. Perhaps it’s that all grandmothers eventually look the same. Maybe as we age and the leylines form and the hair turns grey, there is a uniformity of appearance…

‘Horror of horrors!’ say many of the online ‘eternal youth’ pundits. ‘Give me botox, fillers, the knife.’ Tetsuyo would laugh I imagine, because her advice for a long life is so much more grounded and … sensible! And how lovely is her face for ageing naturally and with grace.

She says ageing is all about your mental attitude. Be at peace, be positive. Tetsuyo, now at 106, plays her piano, keeps active as much as her elderly body will allow, eats fresh food daily that is grown in her ‘field’, talks with her neighbours and relatives when she sees them, takes an interest in society. Practices gratitude and cares very much for her spiritual health. And that is it! Not at all what social media is dishing up to the vast number of western Baby Boomers out there. The simplicity and honesty of her life is perfection.

Her book, Happy On Her Own At 102, published when she was 102, is a dear little book. It sits by my bed, and I believe her far more than glossy online folk who proselytise ad nauseum. Tetsuyo seems to imply that whatever life turns up should be accepted not fought against. With that in mind, I’m almost 75, have had a generous life with no regrets – wouldn’t it be self-indulgent/selfish to want more? Instead, I’d like to live by Granny Tetsuyo’s advice, float as much as possible, be at peace as best one can. Living, loving, being interested in the small things for in the small things, there’s the greatest beauty.

Earlier this week, I was driving to collect my grandson from his school which is situated in a small historic town in southern Tasmania. There are no traffic lights or pedestrian crossings, just a busy main road that is filled with tourist cars all day.

A young Asian man was walking directly across the road in front of me as I drove forwards. He bowed to me and I slowed, noticing he had his hand in the crook of the arm of a very old Australian man. He assisted the old chap to the other side of the road, turned and bowed to me, then spoke to the old man. A small group of Asian tourists were back on the other side of the road waiting for their friend, and I wanted to get out of my car and thank that lovely young man for being kind, for being so polite and reminding me just how much the Asian culture respects elders.

How lovely it would be if all society could be so mannered and caring…

When did manners become second rate in western society? Why?

My grandson hopped into the car, and I offered him a jellybean or two and he replied with thank you. I heard that he opened the door for a woman leaving a coffee-shop the other day, and he wins awards at school for being caring and kind. I’m so thrilled that some measure of manners and etiquette is passing down to him.

Do you remember the time when thank you letters were de rigeur, when invitations were responded to with ink on paper and in a designated way? When seats on public transport were always given to the frail and elderly or to young mums with babies, or God forbid, to women? When men stood when a woman entered the room? When hats were removed when inside. Such politeness – all gone. Are we better for it? I don’t think so. TBH, I enjoyed the respect shown to me as a woman back in the day.

Which is why I was charmed and awed by the actions of that kind Asian tourist. You don’t see it often in the western world.

But back to ageing. Ballet in particular: Pauline and I turned toward each other at the barre on Wednesday last. I had turned the wrong way (I’d been doing it all morning) and we were within inches of butted noses – we literally corpsed. The new routine is intricate and beautiful and Pauline chortled that it was a big ask expecting we geriatrics to get it first go. It was said in great humour and we all laughed. But it was the first time I had ever thought – ‘Yes, we are geriatrics…’ Hmmm. Bring on more convoluted ballet routines so that our brains and bodies get a full, exhausting workout each week – it’ll keep us (sort of) able for a bit longer. This week, I confess to sore quads from moving/stepping arabesques, the old ankle is definitely ready for the op, I’ve lost half a toenail on the same foot (one of those things) and all in all, I have a whole lot of injuries that actual ballet dancers get. Who’d’ve thought? Ha!

I made the soup mentioned last week, with that special ingredient. Not as good as the restaurant, but it was yum and we still have plenty of the final pumpkin left for me to practice more. In addition, yesterday I made berry friands, using our own berries from the freezer. I didn’t have the right tin, so used muffin papers but the friands are delicious. It’s a recipe I found online and it’s light and very almond-ish. Perfect with a cup of tea or coffee. The friands will be made again, as they’re very easy and I may freeze a couple just to see how they work in storage.

Books read and enjoyed? My book of the year has been My Grandmother Sends her Regards and Apologises. Beautifully written, emotive, clever, the characters have such depth and dimension. And one day, I hope to hear that someone has indeed named their dog Worse.

Devorgilla Days was wonderful. I heard via Eva from our Substack Postcard Club that she loved it too.

And Granny Tetsuyo, obviously…

Now I’m binging on all the ‘A Body at’…’ cosy crime novels by author, Dee Macdonald. The Cornish village is very much like Midsomer, with a body every few months. I suspect most of the village businesses will close as there’ll be no one left to patronise them!

I’m still swimming and am so very grateful to Beth (Australia) and to Substack’s Ms. Writer (USA) who have kindly made donations. As Ms. Writer says, any cancer research is good research globally. And I’m indebted to Substack’s Jenny Granville (UK) who tried to get onto the Australian Cancer Council website to donate but was unable, so she donated to cancer research in the UK instead.

And finally, print publishing for the missing three of The Chronicles of Eirie has been enabled and so in the next week or so, the titles should be in distribution. That has been a long haul!

So! Here I am … following Tetsuyo’s advice, keeping active, using my brain, being mindful, creative. I would also add seeing the bright side, accepting that sometimes things are dark, but not for dwelling, ‘being interested in the small things for in the small things, there’s the greatest beauty…’

‘Know that you are the perfect age. Each year is precious for you shall only live once.’ Louise Hay.

Music for this week? Something lovely that turned up on my Instagram feed, right out of left field.