Collecting Truths and Lessons About the World

Writing this blog has been an incredible boon to my mental health. It’s given me consistent structure and routine, a place to reflect on and internalize lessons from media, an outlet to praise or complain about stories and the world, and so much more.

Unfortunately, the nature of our brains — particularly for we ADHDers — is that even as the one writing them, many of the morals and lessons I take and conclusions I draw end up falling out of my head days, weeks, or months later. This time last year I had just re-read The Shining and re-watched Midnight Mass and fervently believed that an outlook derived from ‘The Serenity Prayer’ could and would solve many of my problems.

Today, a few days into a personal struggle with my addictive tendencies, I tried to call up that quite relevant lesson and found only crickets and cobwebs where it was supposed to be. And that’s one that I could even remember writing off the top of my head.

A helpful strategy many ADHDers (and others) use to overcome these deficits in our working memory is externalization: putting important things in writing, asking others to check in on us, placing visual cues in our environments to remind us of things we’d otherwise forget or miss. I’m working on using these techniques more myself, so why not use this as an opportunity to do so!

If you feel so inclined, copy/paste or paraphrase anything that feels important for you to remember and digitally or physically pin it where you’ll see it!

I’m going to be taking these from my own posts, CBT, quotes from books, and probably other places. I’ll endeavour to add to this list over time, and maybe also subtract from it if something ever proves ultimately unhelpful or untrue.

“Fill up your own cup, and let them fall in love with the overflow.” — Harry Styles, shared with me by my friend Lauren and reflected on at the link by Aanya Singhani.

“There is still time” — article on I Saw the TV Glow and how now’s better than never

“Overthinking brings confusion; action brings clarity.” A simple truth that I’ve badly needed to hear all my life. (Related to SMART Goals, Next Step)

Beware Cognitive Distortions — Think of times when you’ve fallen into these unhelpful thought patterns, so that you can recognize them next time they arise.

“Shame is a shackle. Free yourself.” — Matt Haig, The Humans

“You are what you eat” — article on The Buffalo Hunter Hunter and the state of our minds on the internet

[The Opposite of This] — article on a CGPGrey video and The Screwtape Letters

“Don’t aim for perfection. Evolution, and life, only happen through mistakes.” — Matt Haig, The Humans

Life is about connections (between Gods, plus people) — article on Terra Ignota

A better future only requires radical empathy — article on Terra Ignota

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Loneliness & Depression

Escape requires action — article on “A Secret Door”

Life can get very dark, but the sun will shine again — article on Rhythm of War, “De Profundis Borealis”

Behavioural Activation Scheduling — Consciously including activities in your schedule which offer Socialization, Achievement, Pleasure and Self-Care.

Live now, die later: Catharsis of Apocalypse & Death — taking present solace and finding beauty by remembering the existential

Manage Your Expectations — article on Severance and how anticipating perfection is never going to end well

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ADHD & Anxiety

“I [will] have the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” — article on The Shining, Midnight Mass, Alcoholics Anonymous

SMART Goals — Whether doing high-level project management or getting yourself off of TikTok, a helpful guide for actually getting shit done

The most important step is the next one — article on Oathbringer

Get offline — article on surviving with ADHD in the addiction/attention economy

“Everyone has a part to play.” — A friend in response to my article on empathy exhaustion. Just because we can’t all show up 100% for every important cause doesn’t mean we can’t make a difference somewhere, using our personal strengths and interests.

ADHD & Helpful vs. Unhelpful Guilt

Authority is a Mask — We’re all only human, despite what they’d have us think

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Mindfulness

“Be curious. Question everything. A present fact is just a future fiction.” — Matt Haig, The Humans (also very relevant to the themes of KJ Parker)

Queer Theory / False Dichotomies — Seeing beyond true/false, black/white, male/female etc.

“Choose Again” — article on Hyperion Cantos

Think for yourself — brief reflection on ‘Captain Goat’

Design your own universe — article on ‘Design Your Universe’ and ‘Stay the Course’

(Okay, is the above a lot messier than I envisioned? Yes. But hopefully it’ll function.)

Like I said, this is a resource I want to add to over time, to continually reflect on and learn from. So I’d love to hear any aphorisms, lessons or other ways of thinking that get you through the day!

Thanks for reading and until next time ❤