Ah, BUT first things first:
I am number one on Netflix!
OK. OK.
Not me, exactly, but a show with which I was involved!
OK. OK. Not involved exactly - I had no idea about any of it, until it was pointed out to me by assorted other parties…
BUT
I’m definitely in it.
LOOK!
It’s the new Netflix Jose Mourinho doc, which I was going to watch, but now can’t, because…
Yeah.
I’m in it.
They used some 20 year old footage which I barely remember even shooting, in which, I burble on about how fit he is.
First I knew something might be up, I got an influx of random new male followers on Instagram. Not my usual demographic, so I sort of thought something must have happened to pique their interest, but - couldn’t for the life of me think what.
Then, about 8.30pm last night, while I am watching Vanderpump Rules, I get a DM from a mate. It’s a screenshot, not unlike the one above, no further explanation.
“Eh?” I respond. “What’s that?”
”YOU, ON THE MOURINHO DOC!” he replies. “Going on about how handsome he is, and now you want to look at the back pages of the newspapers as well.”
I mean, even if it hadn't been my face, I’d have known, from that quote alone, that it was definitely me.
(I suppose I could get cross about Netflix reducing me to some woman who fancies men but it’s so very on-brand… I can’t.)
Then - everyone else starts messaging.
Mainly, they want to congratulate me on my hair, (EG “LOVE the wolf cut!”) which is weird because I didn’t like it at the time.
If I can’t remember being interviewed on camera about Mourinho - it’s dim, to put it mildly - I can remember getting that hair cut. By accident.
I’d been invited round to the home of a big name hairdresser (I can’t acutely remember that big name, though as you’ll see, that’s good) who was doing one-on-one bespoke sessions with notables (ahem) to launch a new product. When I got to his central London abode, I noted he was in a state of… erm, how to express this? Unusual intensity? Highly talkative-ness? Heightened being? The sort of thing I more generally associated with decadent VIP areas after hours…
But this was like, midday on a Tuesday, in a flat.
ANYWAY, I didn't want to be rude, so let him cut my hair regardless… And that was how it turned out. It had just been long before.
My usual hairdresser was mortified when I returned to him. Told me it’d take 18 months to grow out. Hey ho. I wore it scraped back in a pony tail and didn't sweat it.
But now I can see it does look rather cool.
So here’s my Netflix legacy!
Lechery, and a hair cut with a back story!
Back to the shopping list.
I love this weather. I know, I know, it’s A LOT, not to mention, the not-even-early intimations of incoming disaster.
It’s not just a season, is it? It’s an existential threat.
But I’m just such a summer person, and this is such a summer.
It soothes me. Sun on my skin takes me out of the churn of my head, into the calm bliss of my body. It strips layers of anxiety and worry off me, like I'm shedding skin.
My legs have gone the best shade of brown (light toast), and so have my feet, which I also love for the way a flip flop V is tanned into the top of them.
I love the sound my feet make in flip flops. That soothes me too, it’s like a heartbeat, like: everything’s chill! No need for shoes!
And I love that I don’t have to blow-dry my hair, it’ll air dry itself into a state of gorgeous artless summer-ish dishevelment.
I have that thing where, you know when it feels like you’ve got nothing to wear? A wardrobe full of clothes, and none of them are quite right? In summer, for me, it’s the opposite. I have everything to wear! Because the sun makes me feel better in my skin, I can be a hundred times more inventive and free. I know myself better in summer, I am myself, more fully - so, I am better at getting dressed.
I am also better at shopping. Inspired, almost. Zero buyers remorse, guaranteed! As with my general degree of self knowledge, it’s like I have a higher understanding on Stuff, when the sun’s out. What I need, but also, what’ll be fun!
And largely, because summer clothes, certainly, are cheaper than winter - less fabric, innit, which also means they take up less space - all this Great Stuff, is relatively inexpensive. It certainly packs a joy punch, far beyond its ticket price. (Aplogies for stopping the audio at this point. It doesn’t really work with a list, you see.)
(Some of my links have affiliates.)
EG
This swimsuit from M&S, official name: sheen cami scoop neck, currently on offer for £12 (I KNOW!)
They’re calling the colour “Moss Green”, I’m calling it “Chartreuse”, whatever, point is, it’s an excellent fit - exactly what you want from something that simple - flattering with some compression, and it also really works as a top with jeans (I did it with no bra because of the compression and the small-ish boobs). GREAT with gold jewellery. AND TWELVE QUID!
I went to my friend’s house in Cornwall and got obsessed by her Gluggle Jug (from £19). It’s the noise! They gluggle as you pour! Plus, I am fully on board with the water saving initiative, and keeping a jug of water in your fridge, as opposed to letting the tap run to cold every time you want another glass, is good practise.
This Rixo dress is certainly not £20 (it’s actually £285), but it’s the thing I’ve worn most, bar one, this summer. It’s much more SHEER* (*IYKYK) than it seems in the pic, so much less Pilgrim’s Wife, and generally gorge.
The one thing I’ve worn more than this IS in the twenty quid bracket. It’s
After the pay wall, more glorious things which will ramp up your expereince of life/ your look, without bankrupting you. Including the one ‘fit I’m wearing more than the Rixo dress, the make up which makes you look truly lit from within, a Skims dupe which is arguably better, and certianly cheapar, than the original and an extraordianry and easy styling hack.
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