A feed of the latest posts from our blog.
what I'm doing I'm currently on leave from work for health reasons. I've been feeling burnout, and my bloodwork shows I'm anemic. For the past year or so, I've been caught in a cycle of stress > fatigue > not eating well > fatigue > overwhelm... a doom spiral if you will. My intention around taking this time off work is to rest (like, TRULY rest), gently get caught up on things around my house…
Yesterday I referenced some changes I've been making to help me find myself again: be accountable to myself, respect my capacity and needs, and honor my authenticity. An exercise that I've found endlessly helpful is asking myself "What would the person I want to be do in this situation?" I ask myself this question sans judgment and as a compass of sorts, helping me find the path I'm seeking when I…
Friends, the last few years have been rough - a constant push and pull between healing, uncovering more stuff , healing, and getting hit with challenges. And repeat. Even in the past few months, I had a stress-related panic attack at a work event I was helping host, had a friend pass unexpectedly, paused a project I felt deep passion for, and coped with a melanoma diagnosis. Despite all of it, I…
I'm feeling mighty proud of this little website that I've built. It's taken a bit of polishing to make it feel just right . But even so, when I sit down to write, I feel frozen. I recognize this "freeze" as a larger pattern in my life - something that I've carried around with me since childhood. It's a part of me that interjects little thoughts about what I'm doing, presumably to make sure I am…
By Wendell Berry Love the quick profit, the annual raise, vacation with pay. Want more of everything ready-made. Be afraid to know your neighbors and to die. And you will have a window in your head. Not even your future will be a mystery any more. Your mind will be punched in a card and shut away in a little drawer. When they want you to buy something they will call you. When they want you to die…
Part of my daily routine is taking the dog for an early-morning stroll through our land. It's grounding, expansive, and nourishing. I consider it a walking meditation to help ground myself for the day. My morning nature walk meditation was potent and beautiful this morning. There was a clarity and an ease I've been longing for. I found it in communion with nature and I have a deep gratitude for…
It's May! And although this is the earliest I've gotten my garden in, I still feel behind. Is that just a perpetual spring garden feeling? The garden space I'm growing in has been a labor of love. When I moved to the land last July, the garden had dense weeds and grass up to my chest. I've spent the last 8 months pulling, cutting, burning, and managing weeds nearly every week. I'm proud of the…
I've been in denial. (Which... denial (noun) - An unconscious defense mechanism characterized by refusal to acknowledge painful realities, thoughts, or feelings. Yeeeeep.) I can't quite put a finger on when it started, but I haven't been feeling like myself lately. Each day feels like I'm slogging through quicksand to get through. My normal self-care has been parsed down to the bare minimum. I'm…
I don't want to scroll past a post full of the pictures from your vacation. I want you to call me and tell me the little details: your favorite place visited, what it smelt like, the best food you ate, the funny t-shirt you bought as a souvenir. Tell me about the funny local traditions, how they take their coffee. I don't want to know what you've been doing, without having talked with you. I want…
Feb 23 - Mar 1 "Fennel forest" in the garden. I'm really enjoying building and maintaining this blog. I've learned a lot of skills, overcame some feelings of uncertainty and shame around sharing my thoughts with the world, and connected with some great people in the digital realm! (I even shared it with some people I know in real life, which was a big step - Hi, friends!) Although I often journal…
Yay! Two months into blogging and I'm enjoying it. There are still so many things I want to add to this blog - fix, change, add - but I'm proud of putting it out there in this bare-boned state. It it's a big deal for me to share something that isn't in it's final form, so I'm patting myself on the back and enjoying the process. Here are some highlights from February: Wrote five blog posts - Self…
I've been a bit scattered lately - thoughts zipping around in my skull like angry hornets trying to escape. Along with these brain-hornets - a mid-level buzz of anxiety. It shows up as a slight pressure in my chest, rounded shoulders, quiet voice. This is not the first time I've been here - this part of me emerges when I feel at odds with the world around me. I've spent a significant amount of…
Sometimes, I like to do things "wrong". Sure, maybe the unintended outcomes feel uncomfortable in the moment or frustrating that they didn't go according to plan, but I always learn more than when I research the "right" way to try and achieve perfect results the first time around. I've noticed that the combination of my smartphone and the infinite knowledge contained on the internet has reduced my…
I recently learned about Manfred Max-Neef's Fundamental Human Needs and I've been really enjoying the practice of noticing my emotions and considering what the underlying need is - for both positive AND negative emotions. This practice has helped me realize that in the past, I almost exclusively focused on the emotions that felt difficult - sadness, resentment, confusion, fear - and didn't…
It feels cliche to say, but ever since I can remember, I've wanted to grow food for people. I've spent the last 20 years growing it for myself and my family, but regardless of how fulfilling my personal gardening endeavors went, there was always an itch to do more. But... call myself a farmer? Oof. This year is the first year that I have access to a large swath of land to grow food on. In July, I…
Every Wednesday, I gather with a group of close friends to eat dinner and spend a couple of hours learning Nonviolent Communication skills. This weekly meeting was formed by my landmate, as a way for us to build trust, learn a cohesive conflict resolution communication language, and more simply, just spend some time together. Each week we aim to study a section or chapter of this NVC training .…
2024 felt weird, man. Summarizing a year like last year seems disjointed and messy. I've tried to write this post several times, but nothing is quite sticking. Instead of trying to trudge through and write the post I was hoping to write, I'm focusing on why reflecting is important to me. I want to be able to look back and take note of my personal growth, my evolution. I want to be conscious of…
Welp, after a few hours of research, several days of being stumped, and starting over again ... I made this! It's simple, but I love it. It's made with a simple configuration of 11ty and feels like a solid starting point for me to expand and add as I learn. I'd be lying to say there wasn't a steep learning curve. I tried several different guides to help me get to where I want to be and almost…