When push comes to faceplant: how I move forward in times of overwhelm

But eventually, the dam of my blissful ignorance breaks and I’m flooded with how much clutter is actually before me (and within me, too). This is where I’ve found myself this month.

So a few weeks ago, I drove out to the desert for a long weekend of time in nature, quiet, and just generally unplugged-ness. And, of course, as a break from the inescapable clutter I’ve been stuck in. I came back with fresh eyes, looking at my home with compassion rather than judgement, and decided it was time to finally hold myself accountable to this challenge. My reward? Adopting a new cat.

It’s not something I came across lightly, it’s been six months since I lost both of my house rabbits (10 and 12 years old), and I’ve known it was going to happen this summer at some point. The results were amazing. Knowing I had an interview with the adoption agency as well as a separate apartment walkthrough to verify all was in order, I got to work like I’ve never done before.

In just a couple weeks, my home is now hosting-ready — and the new kitten is settling in just fine (with some spats with my other cat Nova, so we’re taking it slow).

But getting a kitten as the end-result of any overwhelming task is not sustainable — it’s unethical, to be precise. So what am I supposed to do now, how am I supposed to keep the motivation going when I don’t have a huge life change, on deadline, to motivate me?

Psst — if you’re hearing from me for the first time in a while, it means I’m back on Substack after a few years, and I’ve brought you along for the ride. If it’s not a fit for you anymore, no pressure to stick around; either way, it’s good to see you again, friend!

I’m still in the midst of figuring this out, but I do know this: The more pressure I put on myself to get it right when every alarm bell is ringing, the more likely I am to shut down entirely.

So, while I’m not an expert, I have experience navigating both internal and external chaos (as I’m sure we all do). I think there’s immense value in sharing what’s working and not working for us — because who knows what will work for each other?

Here’s the honest list of things that I’m adopting (for now) and nixing (also for now). Call me a Patrick Swayze song, because I’m like the wind — my needs change and I don’t always know why.

Here’s what’s working for me right now:

• Time tracking with strategic outcomes

• Forward-thinking; if all goes well, I’ll have my cats well into my 50s, which makes it easier to envision me in that decade. Wtf am I doing to be better suited for that season of life, now?

• Deadlines (scary version) — basically, a deadline with a consequence vs. a self-imposed deadline

• Saying no, not right now. This helps me still maintain obligations and relationships, but also honors my own capacity

• Location-based tasks like writing, admin, etc, in places like my kitchen table, the cafe nearby, my hammock on the porch, the brewery down the road

• Social pressure and body doubling, great for when you have guests coming over

• And, of course, a proper dose and consistent schedule of my ADHD medicine

Here’s what’s not working for me right now:

• Time tracking with no end goal of what I’m going to do with it

• Music — I’m not sure why this isn’t working for me in the way it was before!

• Self-punishment, because the more I punish myself the more I avoid doing the things I need to do

• The ever-beloved pomodoro technique (and this website), although this might make it’s way to the “working for me” category soon

• Notion; I just updated a previous article I wrote and I stand by its helpfulness, but admittedly I’m not using it to my advantage lately

It’s always a push and pull, and I’m learning to be more fluid in my approach to productivity. But I still need to solidify my containers, because the waters of “get it done” can easily leak into my personal life. Suddenly, everything becomes damp with a need to be productive, and there’s no rest there.

Owls getting weighed, just watch it. 🦉 // A 30-day series of trying art in new mediums in order to rekindle a love that once was, compiled in a 30-minute video. // Hearing my therapist say “wow that’s growth for you.” (Do I win therapy now?) // My bff’s nature photography greeting cards with a silly, delightful twist. // An AI website building tool I used to prototype a popup business idea, stay tuned. 🦎 // This Instagram account that pairs activism and political commentary with vintage textiles and embroidery. // A sweet question I overheard from a couple on their first date: “So, tell me about your two best friends and what you love about them?” // And this:

Each week, I’ll share something I’ve learned that makes my life a little easier, more efficient, or just plain more fun.

When everything is overwhelming, use the “push it off” method to save you stress and to still feel productive. I basically only have two settings — “right now” and “never” — so these things really do help me manage. Here are a few ways I implement this:

• Ask a virtual assistant like siri, alexa, or whatever ever-listening device you use to remind you at a later date. I remembered something I wanted to share with a colleague while enjoying time with my partner this weekend, so my action was simply, “hey siri remind me on monday to ask about the status of the article on success”. I took action, but I didn’t leave the present moment for longer than a few seconds.

• Schedule slacks and emails. Even if it’s 3pm, if the message is not urgent you do not need to deal with those communications before signing off. I also schedule emails to send the next day, because I don’t want to receive a reply the same day and distract myself further.

• Put it on your calendar for another date and time. In the past, I’ve even relegated tiny, non-time-sensitive tasks to a space in my day I called “chaos hour”. It’s basically a marathon hour of distraction, hopping from one task to another, and it’s as exhausting as it sounds. But! You concentrate all that task-switching energy to a specific moment in the day or week which makes it easier to rest and reward after.

P.S. If you didn’t catch it, I curated The Weekend Edit from The Good Trade a couple weeks back, where I mused about how agave blooms may signify finality, but not an end. Check it out here.