Letters to a New Homeschooler

Dear T –,

Building on the practical aspect of living the life in Christ, it’s important to think about the kind of atmosphere we establish in our homes. Charlotte Mason breaks education down into three distinct, but complimentary parts: atmosphere, discipline, and life. Think of a 3-legged stool: if only one of the legs is missing it can’t stand up or hold any weight. It’s the same with education – if we ignore one of those three aspects we end up with some serious instability.

Let’s start with atmosphere. Of course atmosphere is partly created by our physical surroundings, but it’s also much more than that. Comfortable and functional living spaces play a role, but our general attitude and our spiritual disposition also determine the atmosphere of our home. Natural light and fresh air are important, but so are speaking with kindness and practicing repentance and forgiveness when we sin against one another.

We can fill our shelves with good books, but we also need to be readers ourselves if we want our children to read. Minimizing visual clutter and chaos can help foster a calm atmosphere, but so also does making space to listen to one another and showing genuine interest in the thoughts and feelings of those around us.

At first glance these things might seem unrelated to education, and especially to academic pursuits, but when we do the work of making our home atmosphere one of trust and love and acceptance, we are laying rock-solid ground in which it becomes possible to sow the seeds of all the ideas we want our children to learn about and engage with.

Think of it this way: if my children have the best curriculum in the world, but they’re not comfortable coming to me with struggles or questions because I’ve made it clear to them that I’d rather be doing other things, then why should they try? Or if we work so hard on math that they’re ready for calculus at age 10 but I’m constantly pushing them to the point of tears in my eagerness to show off my prodigy, how will there ever be any love, either between us or of math itself?

Does everything have to be perfect at all times? Of course not! But once again, intentionality is essential. We can create spaces for displaying beautiful art (including all the lovely fingerpaintings!), for making music, and engaging with nature. We can set boundaries around technology that we are comfortable with. We can keep a clean house and make things beautiful to our hearts’ content. We can acquire all the best books and curricula and the highest-quality school supplies, but if we’re not simultaneously watching over the atmosphere we’re creating with our words and our attitudes and our interactions, then we only have the trappings of education; we’ll be missing the deeper work that is involved in the relating, both to one another, and to the ideas themselves.

You already have an atmosphere in your home. Examine it and see where you’re already doing well, and look for the areas where you can do even better in building an atmosphere that fosters strong, healthy relationships which will serve to scaffold all the subsequent learning.

Love,

Lisa