We didn't win.

If you've been following along, This Is Woman's Work was nominated for an Ambie Award. They call them the Oscars of podcasting, which feels… ambitious. Let's just say it's the Oscars in its indie-film era.

But still a big f*@king deal (at least for me).

We didn’t win.

But friend, we didn’t lose either.

Being nominated. Being invited. Being in that company. I am still riding that high. I didn’t think we’d win, and I didn’t need to. I was just happy to be in the room.

Except.

I didn’t actually get to be in the room.

Jay and I drove to New York at an ungodly hour Sunday morning to beat the snowstorm that proceeded to shut the city down for two days. We had plans. Broadway. Michelin-star dinner. The whole “let’s be fancy and celebrate” thing… because the awards just so happened to fall on Jay’s birthday.

Everything canceled.

Midday Monday, we get the email: the Ambies are postponed a day so people whose flights were canceled could make it.

Totally understandable.

Also… neither of us could stay.

My first reaction? Relief. The introvert in me was dreading the red carpet and the reception. All that small talk. All those humans. So much eye contact.

And then came the disappointment. Not being in the room. Not getting to meet the people I admire. Not feeling the energy of it all.

So we Plan B’d.

We created our own snowy-day pub crawl. We couldn’t walk more than two blocks without freezing our faces off, so we hit the four hotel bars that were open and followed official pub crawl protocol (Jay has very strict rules about this).

Then we woke up at 5 a.m. to drive home.

I watched the awards via livestream… taking pictures of my TV from my phone. (The quality is… what you’d expect.)

And somewhere in the watching, I realized one of the two outfits I brought would have been the clear, obvious choice.

Which led to the question: where is that outfit?

Long story short: when we left the hotel at 5 a.m., an emergency vehicle came up the street, so we jumped in the car fast. Took off. Ten seconds later Jay realized the trunk wasn’t fully closed, pulled over, jumped out, shut it.

What we didn’t realize?

The garment bag had slid out.

Didn’t notice when we unloaded the car. I thought he grabbed it. He thought I did.

So somewhere out there in the snow is a garment bag containing:

• one dress

• one gorgeous top

• two pairs of pants

• and my inability to make decisions

That part? I’m pissed about.

The rest? Still feels like winning.

So that was my Ambie experience.
Some highs. Some lows.
A snowstorm. A livestream. Lost clothes. A win that wasn’t a win.

Would I have loved to be in the room? Yes.
Am I still ridiculously proud? Also yes.

Either way… we showed up.

And life goes on.

And we keep going with it.

💕,

N