Week 8 & 9: A Little Behind, Not At All Sorry

Welcome to Subtract to Succeed. If you’re exhausted by doing everything “right” and ready to try the opposite, you’re in the right place. I’m Nell, and I help ambitious, big-hearted leaders escape the addition trap and build their subtraction muscle — because doing less, more intentionally, is the only path to a life that feels as good as it looks.

Confession: this one’s a few days late. But there’s a good reason (that I don’t spill til the end).

But first, here’s a whistlestop tour through the fortnight: we lost some sweaters, old and scratchy alike (Weezer, Day 56), and I boarded a plane and [GASP!] didn’t open my laptop (Billy Joel).

Keb’ Mo’ and Rosanne Cash called in a more feminine, systems-thinking approach. Um, yes, please.

Colbie Caillat gave us permission to stop trying so hard. Also, yes.

Joni Mitchell reminded us we can’t fully know anything from either side.

The Indigo Girls made the case for taking things less seriously, and I actually wrote the dissent to Coldplay’s “Fix You”: I don’t actually need fixing, just a reminder to follow what I already know in my bones.

Then a crane showed up on my morning walk, redirecting what could’ve been a Dog Day with out loud delight.

I shared my journey querying agents after a very good hybrid-publishing offer, and the 11-year-old bookworm in me who still wanted the traditional deal (Day 64, which maybe unsurprisingly, given the fellow gold star junkies and authors on this list, got the most gold stars from you all).

KT Tunstall helped me name envy as a scavenger hunt worth taking seriously, and Joni Mitchell showed up again to make sure we noticed what we’ve got before it’s gone.

The Beatles reminded us we’re not the only dreamers.

And then Pink Floyd provided a fabulous soundtrack for a high-energy day: great feedback on a high-stakes project, followed immediately by a shopping trip for a pair of pants I was thrilled about all weekend. I say this was well-earned, behavioral-psychology-approved reinforcement for the long, quiet, often-solo work of writing. Harnessing money as a tool.

Which brings me to Day 69. Which doesn’t actually exist, sort of on purpose. I didn’t miss it. I started it a couple of times, on Sunday, from the shores of a glacial lake with friends I was two years overdue to see. Each time, there wasn’t enough cell service for the lyrics to load. Hallelujah. I let it go.

And here’s the part I want to call out: I didn’t scramble the next morning to backfill it so the streak would look unbroken. That would’ve earned me a particularly worthless gold star.

Because the truth is, these two weeks have been remarkably easy. The book proposal — as discussed in yesterday’s Optimism Scenario — is moving again. Fast and well.

My TEDxSanDiego script, once we stopped forcing the horse metaphor into it, has been almost effortless, and very fun, to memorize.

Grant and I agreed on nine wallpapers for Big Sky without a single fight. I’ve started taking real recovery days after a stretch of seven-day workout weeks that had left me sore and a little too proud of it.

None of this is coincidence. When you’re doing what you’re supposed to be doing, things flow.

So here’s what I’m carrying into next week: where might your own practice be working better than your linear or one-dimensional metrics would suggest?

Keep on rollin’,
Nell

P.S. Paid subscribers get full access to the original 100-Day Subtraction Practice that kicked all of this off. I'm building it out as an official Perk next week, but the archive's live now if you’re a now-better-than-later type!