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JOHN'S MUSIC BLOG · Apr 17, 2026

THE REPORT: 4/17/26

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JOHN · JOHN'S MUSIC BLOG

Kels! “Chi 2 London”

A new era of anglophilia is upon us: Young Illinois digi-crooner Kels! has pulled a bit of a reverse “American Boy” here, flying the Union Jack while enjoying a treat from the local Cold Stone Creamery. After some recon, it seems as if parts of the video were shot in Oak Park, a Chi-Town suburb with enough lore that I could probably write an entire blog post about it. I guess the town looks a little British?

Guttersnipe “Keep Honking! We’re Trapped in a Memetic Bottleneck”

I don’t think I need to read another “Keep Honking!” joke for the rest of my life, and this song title’s take on the aging millennial hipster bumper sticker trope has not made me change my mind. You all had a good run. But facts are facts: Guttersnipe is one of the more brutal bands in the mix right now. Taken from their first record in five years, “Keep Honking!” has guitars that sound like distorted Casios, or maybe the other way around, plus blast beats, plus impressively nightmarish vocals.

AyooLii and Certified Trapper “Carry and Conceal”

I hope “Carry and Conceal” is the result of AyooLii and Certified Trapper hearing “Kwik Trip” and deciding to step up their pop chops, but that is a fantasy tale. Whatever the intention, it’s one of the catchier recent tunes from two Milwaukee rappers who exist a half generation above Lightris and Sero. The way AyooLii hits those high notes during the second half of the chorus? Better than The Beatles.

Iceage “Ember”

Not many rock and roll units have been able to navigate early mid-career like Iceage. “Ember” sounds like it could be the first single from a new band. Context is important, people; unless you only want to appeal to the embittered faithful at your local record fair, it helps to stay fluent in the vernacular as it develops. There are other things, too, that, in the case of this band and its singer, probably also help. But those are not things you can learn.

Shyweek “Roll”

“Roll” is John’s pop tune of the week. It sounds like Bladee wrote a song for a C-tier boy band, but the group rejected it, so he took it back for himself, but the song ended up flopping, but then, two years later, it blew up on TikTok. You know?

JOHN’S MUSIC BLOG PRESENTS… THE BONUS THREE

Tommy Fleece “Bounce”

“State fair / Circus / I’ll see you at the mall.”

Monaleo “Crossroads Freestyle”

I used to do this live interlude where I would loop the “I don’t wanna die” passage of “Tha Crossroads” and put a whole lot of delay on it.

Tony Molina “Somewhere There’s A Feather”The Bay’s preeminent power popper with a cutty Nico cover. Have a nice weekend, everyone.

MISCELLANEOUS LISTENING

Discharge Early Demos - March / June 1977

Ace of Base “Don’t Turn Around”

ST6 JodyBoof STRIKE CLUB

The Justin Bieber net art performance at Coachella

Chief Keef “The Real Chief Keef”

Rio Da Yung OG Yerr On The Street Live Performance

Josephine’s Next Million Miles Buckle Up

Jonathan Richman “I Eat With Gusto, Damn! You Bet”

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