Once an Adulterer, Always an Adulterer

This guy posts the old adage, “Once an Adulterer, Always an Adulterer,” trope.

As a forty-something-year-old man, married for twenty+ years, I am a veteran of this life. Experienced all the highs and lows. CIA levels of OpSec and guarding what I say and do. Evolving my affair game over the years. Up to this point, right now. After more than two plus years with no AP, and genuinely thought I was done; I was content with life and where I was at. Enjoying not chasing, searching, and the mental toll looking for an AP takes on you.

That is until the very reasons I started in the first place are highlighted once more. A heavy sigh and remembering the moments when x. And feeling y. To then ask: Can you actually get out? Obviously, divorce would be out, but can you realistically remain married and get out of the affair game? I’m not convinced personally, and feel it’s only a matter of time until I drop an M4F once more, maybe...

This one is a sore subject for me since I’m clean now.

NO MORE ADULTERATING FOR ME.

But, I tell ya, it’s a struggle not to find the easy way out.

When we have our umpteenth argument about something stupid, and I have to listen to his endless burps, or he has to help me when he doesn’t feel like it….

There’s no difficult communication with your partner when you’re on the prowl. It’s just heady validation and excitement with a potential new lover.

“I love your hair! So sexy!”
”You look great. I can’t wait to meet you.”

It’s all surface veneer and ego strokes.

Living with and loving an imperfect person is far more challenging. I, being the immature idiot that I am, want to bury my head in the sand and go looking. Yet, I realize that while I can, I shouldn’t.

I’ve learned something, lol, in all my years.

Hey, it’s too damn simple to escape.

No one wants to take the hard route. The difficult conversations, the “talks” that end in anger, the arduous work of a partnership.

One adulterer shared his story, “I was a veteran, decided to get clean. I told my wife, got help, and started rebuilding. It’s been worth it.

We can stay in the ‘game’ and remove heart intimacy from our spouse, or we can get honest. The game just defers the pain, and it has interest like a loan shark.”

That interest like a loan shark is a damn good way to put it.

Pull the trigger and leave. That’s what I did, eventually.

My favorite comment:

That’s what I’m doing, peeps—I’m your adultery coach.

No more playing the game for me. I’m watching from afar and giving pointers.

The irony of me being faithful is just nuts.

The Queen of Adultery not cheating?

Have you been fully faithful in any relationship? Are you proud of yourself for not cheating? Was it hard not to step out?

Tell me in the comments.