You Are a We

One in three people have gone to work with this wardrobe malfunction.

I’ll have your answer coming up.

We’re a proud species. We like to think we’re independent. Nobody bosses us around.

It’s an illusion. You’re essentially a minority in your own body, taking orders from a committee.

There’s a popular myth that you’re carrying around five pounds of bacteria. People joke that those “last five pounds” you want to shed are really stowaways living in your body.

Except that number is way off. It’s more like half-a-pound of bacteria. One science writer compared it to the weight of a hamster, which is a funnier visual anyway. You’ve got a hamster’s worth of “foreign” material in you right now as you read this.

Of course, we tend to think of all bacteria as bad. That’s why we keep the hand sanitizer industry in business.

The truth, however, is that most of those critters are helping you, especially in your gut. You couldn’t live without them.

The numbers are staggering. While there are about 30 trillion cells that are you, there are 38 trillion bacteria cells.

And it’s not like they’re silent passengers. Your gut bugs have opinions. They nudge your cravings, affect your mood, power your immune system. You could say they manage the chemical plant that runs the whole show.

The next time you feel like a donut at 3 o’clock? Well, now you know who to blame.

It’s a little sobering. By cell count, there’s more of them than “us.” You are, in essence, a We. You didn’t really decide something this morning. It was more like a vote.

So the next time you catch yourself feeling like the captain of your own ship—proudly, stubbornly independent, nobody’s fool—remember the committee. They let you think that.

It keeps you feeding them.

They’ve gone to work with what wardrobe malfunction?

A tag still attached.

The pro move, of course, is committing to it and calling it a design choice.

Oh no! These Facts and Opinions look so similar!