Years ago, my acupuncturist and friend told me, “Megan, healing is non-linear.” She was right in more ways than one. She walked me through a challenging time of healing, and though I have recovered, I feel strong again. These words have been hung on the walls of my brain to help navigate life collectively.
Now, here I am healing again. healing from an injury and then surgery. healing neurological pathways, nerves, muscles, blood flow, and the hardest of all, my ego and identity, in this process. Every day looks different. Some of it is hard. Actually, often it is hard. It is monotonous and not glamorous at all. I wake up, eat a breakfast full of fiber and plant-based protein, drink water and coffee, and then spend over an hour in the gym to get my muscles back and remind my body it can do this again. Sometimes everything feels great. Sometimes it feels really hard, and I can’t do what I did the day before. I get frustrated, elated, happy, and then often times a bit discouraged if I am honest. I rock between gaining ground I didn’t have the day before and stepping back a bit to ice and heal a little more.
The thing about identifying any process as being non-linear is that we immediately can see that what feels like backwards isn’t actually that at all. If we stick to linear thinking of anything what feels like it doesn’t progress or goes back to how it was a week ago, does feel that way, but instead if we see the swirls and back steps against the forward ones more like a dance around the room where some ups and downs create the motion and movement of growth, we find that back is just our body, nature, our deeper self’s need to try again at that thing. Instead, it reminds us we aren’t there just yet, but what feels repeated just means we need a reminder again of that one thing.
Right now, we are seeing this outside our windows. A massive storm is rolling in that is said to bring over 20” of snow this weekend, when a week ago we were basking in the sunlight and stripping our coats off. Spring didn’t just seem imminent but was present. The thing is, though, I never see these late winter and early spring snowstorms as steps backward, but instead as part of the process of growth. The land, us, and our bodies may need more of this to prepare for what lies ahead of us in late spring and early summer. I am not upset about one more weekend to hunker in with a cozy blanket, do a puzzle, and reminisce about the gifts of the slow days of winter. Though the days that felt more like April were a gift that strengthened me to continue, these days may do the same, but in ways I am unaware of just yet. A little more rest. A little slower, won’t bother the deeper parts of our bodies right now.
Late winter and early spring are the most beautiful and trying examples of non-linear growth. What we see shifts and changes quickly and dramatically. The steps forward usually lead to a feeling of back soon there after, but then one day, the clouds part. The cold heads north, and the sun erupts over our world once again in the tender greens of mid-spring. The daffodil blossoms. The morels emerge. The ramps make the woods smell of pungent onions. It all changes once again. To think this storm isn’t part of that process is to ignore the beauty of the process we are in.
For a while now, I have had a quiet little project that I was inspired to create. I have worked in every margin the day would give or when inspiration struck, to define this idea I had. At first, I wanted to be linear with it, but then I remembered the statement of things never being truly linear. I embraced whatever pieces came, knowing from life and the seasons that this actually can show us the details we need. After all this time jotting down ideas, springing to life the concepts sitting in carline or just while sipping coffee in the morning, it began to be pieced together, and it became evident to me how it would take shape. Embracing the non-linear process showed me how to develop linearly.
I can think of 100s of ways in nature this happens, from the roots of an acorn to the growth of a garden or even to the way growth happens in a chick, for instance. Everything embraces this process, but yet as humans we struggle to see it, feel it, and most of all trust it. These days of the ending of winter and the beginning of spring, though, are the strongest lesson in trusting a far more non-linear process in our lives, whether it be healing, our work, our timelines, our year, or so much more. At some point, the process makes sense, but many times in the transition and in the middle is becomes blurry, swirling, zig-zagged, or even just a little insane feeling. This is the process I am learning to trust in new ways now, and every time I trust this, the better the outcome becomes. Most of all, the more joy I find in the wild ride it takes me on while I await the smooth road that eventually emerges.
Find out more info about this upcoming class I am teaching! If you have wanted to hire me for a design, I am currently being super selective about projects, so I can more intentionally focus on properly stewarding the properties I have, but I am offering these amazing experiences where we can work together in a group setting and design your landscape together. So PLEASE come and enjoy.
Random writing from my notes and notebooks over the weeks that gather in the spaces between in life.
3/13/2026
The road never looked the same after that day. I knew it wouldn’t. The mucky lines of the tiremarks in the gravel that only form in spring would always hold the memory of loss. The scent of the pines would remind me of how this moment was the beginning of facing what felt impossible. The splashed mud on the sides of the truck would instinctively bring about how I felt in my bones that this was the shift that I would remember forever.
3/10/2026
Creating a landscape is like writing a story for generations to come. Many of the things I design, I rarely get to see them in their entire vision. The trees I plant, those are ideas and visions, not the highlight of the story for me, but someday they will connect to someone I will never know and be part of someone’s story many decades from now.
3/9/2026
Instead of war, I would like to sit beneath a tree on a Monday afternoon and not think about the cost of groceries. Instead of war, I would love to know that kids everywhere are safe. Instead of war, I would love for libraries to thrive. Instead of war, I would rather not think about my child’s safety at school. Instead of war, I would rather have old-growth forests preserved. Instead of war, I would rather have healthcare. Instead of war, I would like clean water. Instead of war, I would like farmers to be rich for growing things the way they believe in. Instead of war, I would rather every child have healthy school lunches grown by local farms. Instead of war, I would rather that oil companies be held accountable. Instead of war, I would like to believe in the world again in kindness and love, and that they can outweigh hate and fear.
Just some things happening and that I am thinking of lately:
ON MY MIND: Interiors. Since spending all winter in my space in a way I haven’t in a while, I started really thinking about our home and what I want it to be. 9 years ago, we moved in. We were sort of exhausted from the construction process, and our kids were little. We didn’t want to get too tight on any direction with aesthetics, so we kept things mellow and neutral to take on the seasons of our life, but it has never felt fully complete for us. So Mike and I have been working together to really get a bit more focused on this for ourselves, and I am really enjoying the process. We are looking at how to repurpose things, paint, and more. Mike and our son are working on some art for the space, and we are just letting ourselves meander through the process of bringing it to life as a family. If you are interested in some of the vibe we are looking for, you can check out the board. The biggest theme is letting it get a bit weird and personal. We like a healthy mix of layered textiles, pops of color, funky art with a folk twist, and tones rooted in nature.
OBSESSING ABOUT: The desert. We are planning a quick little getaway to Arizona to visit the Saguaro Desert, Sedona, and the south rim of the Grand Canyon. We will spend a few days in Scottsdale, where I booked some fun things to do in the world of art and conservation. We are excited to visit this artist space in Phoenix, called Cosanti, in particular. Our neighbors have gone a few times and told us about it. It looks really cool.
COOKING: In these transitional points of the year, I look to simple, easy, but deeply nutrient-rich meals. This simple northern white bean dish is my favorite with the creamy fennel and the broth with a bit of parmesan. 1-cup of the beans packs about 14 g of protein and lots of other great nutrients just on its own. It serves up a nice and easy to take with you lunch as well.
WEARING: Work boot changes. After tearing my ACL, I really stopped enjoying my Blundstone boots. I still have them, but for long days out in the field working, they aren’t the right boots for work for me. I got into wider box shoes, and I ended up narrowing in on these Keen boots to replace my Blundstones for work. I still will wear them, but not for long days on my feet. I have high arches and a wide ball with a narrow heel. So far, these have been great the few times I have worn them. I should note that I tried a bunch of other options. None of them felt as good as these ones did.
LISTENING: I have been plugging away at the playlist for spring. I am sort of into the vibes here. Take a listen while I am still tuning it.
THE SPRING GUIDE IS COMING!
Use the link below to become a member so you can get access to the new one with all the updates. I plan to post about it in the next week or so.
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