respectfully, what was i supposed to do?

because tell me why you'll walk up to me the next day, look at me in the face and say i’m disrespectful for not waving back at you? helloo?!! i didn't even know you were waving. lemme give you guys the back story.

it was a very random day and i was going back to my hostel from school. I had finished whatever i wanted to do in school that day but now, there was traffic. it was not even the kind of “go slow” traffic, it was the kind where car owners put off their cars because it was not moving at all.

i hate traffic, i really don't have the patience for it so i decided to walk. mind you, my hostel is four bus stops away from school.….asides the traffic, the road around that axis was bad and honestly? walking felt like the intelligent option. not to mention the fact that i was listening to music in my earpiece while walking, which i love so much.

eventually, i got to a junction where the traffic ended, i stopped a bus, sat in the front seat and put my earpiece in. this is probably where everything went wrong. you see, once my earpiece is in and i start listening to music, i leave this planet and enter a world of my own. i’m no longer aware of my surroundings(this also got me robbed though😭 and I wrote about it here-

and apparently, i didn't learn my lesson.

the bus could be going to another state or even be filled with kidnappers and i'll just be there enjoying my music while looking outside the window because well, it's peaceful and therapeutic.

so there i was, listening to music, enjoying the breeze coming into the vehicle while completely disconnected from whatever was going on.

and then, i saw some people waving. honestly, i wasn't even sure what i saw in that moment. i just noticed some hands up in the hair. did I know they were waving at me? no.

did i consciously decide to ignore them? absolutely not. was i even thinking about them? not at all. my brain was occupied with the song, it was raye's click clack symphony playing and whoever has listened to that song probably knows how loud it is. the song had my full attention so whatever was going on inside and outside the bus was between God and them.

i continued listening to my music. sooner rather than later, i got to my hostel and settled down. later that evening, i actually remembered seeing those people. i wondered,

“who were those people waving at”

but i couldn't remember their faces. so i just forgot about it and slept. the next morning, i woke up and got ready for school and at this point, the entire incident had been deleted from my brain.

I had more important things to worry about anyway, basically, we were rehearsing for united nations simulation that day. so i and my coursemates gathered under a tree, where we usually have the rehearsals, every thursdays. i was there, minding my business.

just then, some girls walked up to me and one of them said,

“i didn't think you were this disrespectful”

excuse me? i genuinely had no idea what she was talking about.

i looked at her the way you look at someone who accused you of stealing something you have never seen before.

“what did i do” i asked while laughing. i honestly didn't know why i laughed, it made them more sure of their opinion, i guess😭

and then they took turns in explaining that they saw me yesterday, in a bus, they waved and apparently, i “ignored” them. i was standing there thinking “me?” because i genuinely couldn't understand what was happening.

i was just thinking “when did i look at you” because i knew that if i actually looked at them, i probably would have recognised them, but lemme add that i didn't even know them😭

i was sitting in that bus, listening to music..yes my eyes might have looked that direction but my brain was somewhere in another dimension and apparently to them, it looked like intentional disrespect.

i was shocked, confused and also slightly offended that they just judged my entire personality based on a 5seconds interaction i didn't even know happened.

then, one of them started telling me that she thought i was trying to act like i was above them or something.

ma'am, above you ke? i was in a public bus enjoying my music..how does that situation suggest that i had become royalty? i wanted to ask them if they received an email that morning saying

“congratulations, mayowa is now officially above you and has now become too important to acknowledge people”

and when they said i acted like I didn't know them, i responded that i didn't even know them and somehow, that response didn't help😭

..then i told them that i didn't ignore them on purpose and explained the whole situation.

i think that's the funny thing about humans. we are always too quick to give meanings that were never intended to people's actions and behaviours. if someone doesn't reply your text, you immediately assume they're ignoring you meanwhile, they might just be having a tough time altogether.

i’ve done the same too, many times and that's why recently…when i notice someone doesn't acknowledge me, i make up excuses for them in my head.

i think those girls eventually believed me and even if they didn't, respectfully, what was i supposed to do?