Entry #41

Friday, 15 September 2023

5pm

I’m on the final straight before starting work on the new novel. Just three days to go! I feel like an athlete limbering up for the Olympics, making sure I’m on peak physical and mental form and clearing the decks of all distractions. It’s been an intense few days.

First of all, I had to try and put the ballet about Alan Turing out of my mind. But then the treatment I’ve written for another choreographer for a ballet about Hans Christian Andersen popped into it; my dancer friend messaged to say he’d read it and wanted to tell me it’s ‘brilliant’ and ‘seriously good’. He isn’t the type of friend to say this if he didn’t truly believe it, plus he’s been a close collaborator of this choreographer’s for decades. He said I should submit it to him straight away so I did. Then I managed to come down from my high and did put it out of my mind.

There’s been some other business to attend to. My agent has had the idea of uploading Becoming Ted to Kindle Unlimited – Amazon’s subscription service – which offers authors a lower royalty rate but can do wonders in expanding a readership. As Ted has still only sold very few copies (plus it will have earned out its advance once the foreign payments come through), I think this would be a great idea: at the moment my priority is to get as many readers as possible looking forward to One Love. At our meeting with my publisher on Wednesday, my agent’s assistant relayed the idea to my editor, who promised to go away and investigate. She came back today saying the sales team is in agreement and they just need my permission as this kind of arrangement falls outside the terms of our contract. Obviously, I granted this. And hopefully it won’t take long until it comes to fruition. Although how that will leave my relationship with my agent – and my plan to eventually fire her – I don’t know. And I did feel a pang of guilt

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I also heard that the day in October that my publisher has planned for us to drop off proofs - advance reading copies - of One Love in bookshops around Manchester and then meet journalists in a bar for drinks looks like it’s in jeopardy as a train strike has just been announced. When I relayed the news to my publicist, he said he’d sent out the invitations a few hours earlier so I really felt for him. But I’ve worked out I could probably still make it happen, by travelling up to Manchester the night before, staying at my mum’s house, and coming back to London the following evening (so I could work from my mum’s and still only lose one day’s writing). But we’re going to hang on and see how the journalists reply: it’s quite possible some of our key invitees won’t be attend for the same reason.

Other than all that, my time has been dedicated to sifting through the notes I made for the new novel, working them into my synopsis and chapter breakdown, and filling out my character profiles. And this has left me feeling spent – it’s just so intense! And I didn’t get through it all so will have to go back to it for at least half a day tomorrow. But I’m pleased with what I’ve done and am still feeling confident.

Although it does strike me that, with all this build-up to Monday and the start of my first draft, I am putting a lot of pressure on myself. Then I remembered that one of my teachers at my state sixth-form college – an inspirational woman who gave up her own free time to make sure I had the help and extra tuition I needed to secure my place at Cambridge – that I worked best when under pressure and always rise to the occasion. I also remembered one of my favourite sayings: ‘Pressure makes diamonds’. Let’s hope that’s true in this case!

Saturday, 16 September 2023

4.30pm

I’ve just come to the end of my working day and once again I’m spent. Or jiggered as they say in my home county of Lancashire.

It was Rosh Hashanah – Jewish New Year – last night so we went for dinner at some friends of Harry’s and got home late. But then I woke up just after 6, roused from my sleep by the sound of the cat wailing for her breakfast. Although in the fifteen minutes it took me to haul my knackered old carcass out of bed she decided to go back to sleep – and didn’t bother to come downstairs for another hour.

But none of that matters as I’ve spent the day reading over the latest draft of my working synopsis of the new novel and I’m feeling confident. I really do think it’s looking strong and multi-layered, with some of the best characters, plotlines and twists I’ve created. I know I still have to bring it to fruition but I feel under less pressure for Monday. I should be able to sit down and it’ll flow.

Tonight, we’re meeting friends and seeing a performance by Myra Dubois – one of our favourite drag queens – then going out for dinner. I’m really looking forward to switching off. And tomorrow I need to stay switched off. I’m hoping to go for a long walk on Hampstead Heath, if the rain holds off and this blasted verruca stops hurting me so much. And then I can be in the best possible frame of mind for Monday. The first day of my Olympics!

I may not be Jewish – and only married to a Jew – but the start of a new project does make this feel like the beginning of a new year. And I’m ready to grab this one by the balls and work it for all it’s worth!

The Castle of Stories is out now, published by Pansy.