Are we our best as our unedited selves?

Notes from the conference …

Expectations are best not to have - the nature of everything is what others thought it should be and how they believed it ought to be done - and I’m not in control of anything or anyone - it’s hard enough being in control of ourselves.

Whole truth has no warranty; trust begins where our control over the outcome ends, which doesn’t put us way out there on the skinny branches without a net - it justs feels that way …

I’m talking about truths that could reasonably change someone’s understanding, their choices, or what they believe they’re stepping into with us.

That’s different.

Keeping irrelevant history private is privacy.

Keeping consequential truth hidden because we’re frightened of the answer is something else.

Some truths stay private because they should.

The hardest conversation may be the one where honesty offers no promise about what comes after it; there is ‘what comes next?’ …

We’re terrific at celebrating expectations fulfilled. People arrive early. Seventeen moving parts behave themselves. The pancake flips and lands right side up. We smile, perhaps congratulate ourselves, and get on with the day.

Other outcomes aren’t nearly as tidy.

Plans unravel. Expectations miss by a country mile. Something we did, failed to do, or badly misjudged becomes part of the permanent record between our ears. We own it. We can’t reverse it, edit it, or pretend we’ve forgotten. Then, eventually, comes one person for whom dribbles and drabs won’t do. What happens when somebody matters enough that the whole truth belongs on the table?

Refer a friend