Doodling Through Christmas

Last year, we spent Christmas in a prisoner-of-war camp. This year, we’re doing very little at all except for listening to the carol service on the radio, reading, and lighting the open fire. We’re in the middle of a very slow, self-built kitchen installation and have been without a proper kitchen for some time, so food choices are irrelevant this year, and the air fryer is defining simple cooking and eating.

My youngest has decided to stay at home alone in Glasgow. When I asked if he’d be OK and what his plans were, he replied, “Probably watching The Muppets.”

I tend to keep quiet about my unconventional approach to Christmas, mostly to avoid judgment, pity or shocked faces. Don’t get me wrong, I love special dinners and family get-togethers, but I prefer doing them when the occasion feels special for us, rather than on demand. I reckon that this is partly to do with having a birthday just before Christmas. This year, that birthday felt really special, thanks to my wonderful friends, Jo and Lesley, who travelled a long way for a girls’ weekend away in Pittenweem.

Why Pittenweem? Where is Pittenweem? And what is there?

The answer is that it’s a quiet, tiny fishing village in Fife, the complete opposite of where most people head on the weekend before Christmas. Because of that, I found plenty of self-catering availability, no dramatic price hikes because of the date, and definitely no crowds or big shops. There’s real value in looking at what everyone else is doing and choosing to do the opposite.

I broke the journey by stopping overnight at Atholl Palace Hotel with my son. It’s a place I’ve loved for a long time for its history, beautiful grounds, the spa and pool, the small museum in the basement, and the fact that it remains an independent hotel retaining its original features. In fact, the owner came over to say hello while I was sitting reading in the bar, which I found lovely.

The following morning, I found myself in the quiet relaxation room of the spa, reading Joey Hulin’s Retreat Yourself, and began to wonder whether the weekend ahead could become a retreat of sorts. A self-led one, just as Joey describes.

I marked the pages of the activities or ideas I thought had possibilities, like intention setting, collecting from nature, and some gentle stretching. Luckily, Jo and Lesley agreed, so we set our intentions on day one.

Your time off can be made more relaxing by simply thinking about what you need in those days of rest, rather than just drifting.

I knew that for me, I needed not to think at all, to stop my mind and just rest.

My intention was “doodling”

I’d been gifted a beautiful mindful colouring book for my birthday, and it instantly lit a spark. Throughout my life, I have always enjoyed copying in a detailed way, with pen or pencil, the kind that absorbs both mind and body until there’s no space left for anything else. Maybe it’s mindfulness, flow, joy or the lack of pressure for it to be good. I don’t think it matters really, only that I needed and wanted to doodle at the weekend.

I sometimes sit on the croft and draw what I see in pen, and it brings the same feelings.

For the weekend in Pittenweem, we wandered. We collected stones and shells, visited cafés, photographed, ate freely, watched films, and each evening set aside half an hour to relax, guided by Joey’s pages. I began feeling calmer, more grounded, more peaceful. I half-watched the films while doodling, which was made slightly more challenging by my recent and sudden need for glasses. I used to be rather proud of having reached my fifties with 20/20 vision and no grey hairs. The glasses have well and truly put an end to that illusion now, though.

That weekend, I realised how helpful it was to set an intention and to name it. Even during holidays, taking a moment to think about what you need or want from those days of rest can help you access exactly that. I wonder if you could do the same over this holiday period — even in a very small way?

This winter, I have made a great start on my reading pile and here are my top three from the last couple of weeks.

I was gifted this book recently and was completely absorbed by it for two days. It’s one of those books you feel as though you fall into, fully immersed, while everything else fades into the background.

The story is shocking, yet it’s told in a measured and rational way, which somehow makes it even more powerful. I found myself wanting to time-travel and hug the boy at the centre of it, as he is treated with such neglect and injustice throughout his life. The book moves through experiences of the care system, race, and the search for home, into self-expression through poetry.

I have the hardback version, but had to remove the book cover as screeching pink doesn’t sit well with me. That is not a reflection on the actual contents, though. I read the book over several days after getting over my initial reservations, and it turned out to be a funny, acurate and helpful memoir about midlife women, and it most certainly made me feel less alone.

I adore Joey Hulin, having spent time with her on retreat and within her online circles over the years. She is someone who truly embodies what she teaches, with a genuine talent and deep desire to help others find a calmer, more considered way of being.

This book explores the power of retreats, while also offering practical approaches and ideas for those times when attending a led retreat isn’t possible, showing how to create a meaningful retreat for yourself instead. It’s beautifully laid out and easy to read.

Following a few of Joey’s ideas last weekend was a fairly impromptu decision, but it proved to be a really good one. It’s something I plan to return to and practise more often. I am glad I read this book when I did.

Thank you for reading and supporting,

Wishing all a very peaceful and lovely Christmas, however you choose to spend it.

Margaret x

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