Partner dances generally require two distinct roles: leaders and followers. Traditionally, men learn how to lead, and women learn how to follow. Most new dancers learn roles according to tradition. So did I when I first got into Salsa and Bachata dancing. At the time, it was the obvious choice. It made my inner feminist a little uneasy, though. In the time that I’ve spent in the social dance…
TREEWEEK TWO ended this morning. Around fifty people, who had spent the last seven days living, eating, working and partying together at Seegut Blaue Blume in Buchenhain near Prenzlau, said their goodbyes as a big bus shuttled them back to Berlin, creating the final class trip vibes! From there, some people stayed, whereas others took connecting trains or planes to get back to their homes. I…
“Hosting” was a big theme for me in 2024. In January, I hosted my first two-hour party at my home following Nick Grays’s formula. In March, I traveled to Berlin and co-hosted an Interintellect salon with Simon at his place, talking “meta” about hosting and sharing my experiences from the party. I ended up hosting additional instances of the two-hour party in April and…
Happy New Year! I wish you all a great 2025. This post is not yet a yearly review or planning post, although I plan to write one, but an announcement: to kick off the new year, I’ve decided to take at least a one-month break from X (Twitter), with the option to extend it further or even indefinitely. It’s been my tradition to reflect on my social media usage at the change of the year.…
Am I asexual or not? It’s a question that’s been with me for a long time, and I publicly shared it on my blog for the first time early last year after revealing I’ve been a lifelong single . Around 1.5 years later, my body count is still at precisely zero, which - after my recent birthday - means I’ve entered the wizard club of the infamous 40-year-old virgins. Mission…
I had to make a tough decision, and I want to share it. For a few months, I’ve been working on plans for another trip to India in December. There were a lot of coinciding opportunities. I’ve always wanted to go to DevRelCon , and the next one is in Bangalore . One of my friends from Hyderabad invited me to her wedding. Another friend is going to Mumbai after Christmas, and her brother…
If I told you I feel unlovable, you’d probably stand up in protest. You might say that you enjoy my presence and my contributions. The statement seems absurd. I grew up in a loving family, and while I sometimes may be a loner by choice, I’ve always had friends. And, as I’ve grown older, I’ve become more social and engaged in communities where I feel valued . Hence, let me…
TREEWEEK was a “TPOT camp” in the spirit of other retreats like Jesscamp , which also doubled as the organizer’s extended birthday celebration. It took place last week at “Seegut Blaue Blume” in rural Brandenburg near Prenzlau, more than an hour from Berlin. I signed up because I trusted Simon and his team to create a great event. The location seemed nice, and many…
Last year, I published a few blog posts about being single . Then I stopped. I have started multiple drafts but never completed them. I can’t find the right angle to share my thoughts and tell my story. My mind is full of interconnected thoughts that are difficult to express linearly, and some of these thoughts are uncomfortable to express at all. One reason for starting the series of posts…
It’s April, which means it’s a new month and also a new quarter if you want to think of a year divided into quarters. A great opportunity to look at the first 25% of the year 2024. Looking at mine, I see light and shadow. I started the year with a ton of motivation and clarity about my next steps. Professionally, I wanted to transition my existing client projects where I’m…
A weekly review is a valuable practice to regularly check in with yourself and see how you’re progressing. It should be a part of every self-improvement journey. However, establishing a weekly review as a ritual can be difficult. I have tried a few times and failed to keep up, but now I have found something that works for me. Let me share my approach in the hope that it will be helpful for…
I hosted a party! I mentioned Nick Gray ’s book “The 2-Hour Cocktail Party” in my yearly review post , announced to host one in “early 2024”, and kept the promise to myself! Here’s a little field report about hosting this event. For those unaware of Nick’s party concept, here’s the gist: you invite around 15 people using a website that allows you to…
So far, Twitter/X has been my primary social media site, but a year ago, I wondered if and how I should continue using it in light of changes made by its new owner, Elon Musk. I decided to take my time with things and observe the changes , considering that I was at a time when I didn’t focus on marketing and outreach for work. For 2024, however, I want to connect to more people to find…
Once again, we’re in the liminal space “between the years”. Christmas is over, and the new year hasn’t begun. My issue with times like these that are outside the routine, and that means most holidays, is that they can only ever fulfill some of the expectations we have for them. They can be a time to do nothing and not feel you’re supposed to do anything. They can be a…
Today, I’ve gifted this blog a proper “About” page and also a “Now” page .
The “married introvert” is a stereotypical type of person that I want to introduce today. I’m describing them as men because that’s the version I’ve observed more often and that I find more relatable (for obvious reasons); however, it can certainly be a person of any gender. And, of course, this is a simplification created to make some points. It doesn’t mean…
Whenever I converse with a foreigner living in Germany, I hear that they find it hard to make friends with locals, and their circle is mostly other migrants and internationals. And every time I listen to it, I wonder about the causes. Are we Germans racists who don’t want to interact with others? Or are the foreigners not even trying to be a part of society and try to stick with their own…
Last week I attended Jesscamp , a fun week-long event where 60-ish people, who spend too much time on Twitter, rented an entire hotel in a rural village in the Black Forest to hang out in real life. A few attendees already wrote their impressions of the event in blog posts or Twitter threads, and I enjoyed reading those. I also want to share my thoughts a week after the camp’s wrap-up.…
Meta, the company behind Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp, is about to launch a new social network. Its working title is “Project 92” (it used to be “Project Barcelona”, and may be named “Threads”), and they position it as a direct Twitter competitor. In other words, it’s a heavily text-focused network compared to the visually focused Instagram and the…
I’m currently a full-time freelancer working with various clients. I also work on a few other projects to turn into products, individually and with a partner. I have many ideas on what I could do professionally, but I also have limited time, attention, and resources to invest in my work. If I am overwhelmed with too many things, I will not make enough progress in each. I’ve recently…
Friends who have served me food at their places are sometimes irritated if I only put a small amount on my plate. “Are you sure you don’t want more?” they ask, trying to be a good host and feed me plenty. “Let me finish this first”, I say, “and then I will take more”. Which I usually do if the food is good. I learned this as a child. My parents and…
I’ve joined Playground , an “anti-procrastination platform” run by Ida, who I know from Ness Labs . I was curious about her approach that sets up an accountability buddy system but also tries to gamify the whole process. The program is cohort-based and runs over three months. Ida assigns you a buddy in the first session who you’re supposed to meet once every week, and you…
The word “asexual”, when applied to humans, describes a person who experiences no or extremely low sexual attraction and desire for sexual interactions with other people. Asexuals consider it an orientation similar to hetero- and homosexuality. Instead of being attracted to one or more specific genders, they are attracted to none. In the asexual community, there’s also a…
I’m single. I don’t know if this comes as a surprise to you. Of course, you have yet to hear me talking about a wife or a girlfriend. But I also rarely talk about dating and finding someone. The bigger surprise might be that I’m a lifelong single. In other words, I was never in any romantic or sexual relationship, ever. Yes, seriously. There are many words to describe people like…
I’ve returned from a month-long trip to India and the UAE. I visited Bangalore for around two weeks and then Hyderabad, Mumbai, and Dubai for roughly a week each. Out of these places, Bangalore was the only city that I had visited before, but the last time was in 2010. I’ve always wanted to go back and see if and how the city has changed, though I kept postponing my travel plans. I…