Hey! I’m so stoked you’re here!
My guess is you’re an artist, a creative, a rad being with lots of ideas swirling around in your head that you want to get out into the world. If so, you’re in the right place -
this is where I’ll be sharing monthly notes, thoughts, and encouragement about the creative journey to remind you that art matters.
I’m starting this because I need the reminder, too. Last year I landed in a pretty funky and dark headspace where I truly (thought I) believed:
Art doesn’t matter.
Yikes! Maybe you’ve been there before, but it was the first time I’d felt it to be a full truth.
A big bout of burnout plus cultivating the foundation of a new life in Western North Carolina plus experiencing and healing from Hurricane Helene were the major factors that led me to this belief which then led me to take a full step back from my creative business and art-making altogether (more on that in a future post).
Right before I took that step back, it was as if I could see my white-knuckled grip holding on to all of it tighter and tighter - the dreams made reality, the productivity, the revenue goals. The tighter I gripped, the faster it all turned into a hamster wheel that spun faster and faster and felt harder and harder to keep up with. It was rolling me away from time with my friends, my community, myself, and other valuable parts of my life ecosystem.
Something had gone awry.
I’d achieved the goals I set out to achieve when I started my business and was left with a big sense of, “Now, what?” I knew my business model worked, I knew I could theoretically keep it going, but the thought of it felt heavy. That heaviness was coupled with the whisper of a feeling that there was so much else left to explore.
So after a lot of initial resistance, I released the grip. I let go. I fully opened my hands and let it all drop.
I didn’t make new art. I didn’t set new business goals. I didn’t add anything new. I bailed on projects I’d planned to start, bailed on projects I’d started, and only kept the bare-minimum commitments. I didn’t try to keep it going.
I truly thought I was quitting.
Instead, what I couldn’t see in that moment, was that it was all a pruning process - something that is necessary for plants, gardens, ecosystems, and businesses to thrive. Once I released the grip, I could see the birds-eye view of not only my creative business, but my creative journey as a whole. I started to slowly and methodically prune back the parts of my business that no longer felt good, were overwhelming, or unaligned with what was true in the present moment.
To my surprise, those parts were also the aspects of the business that were doing the best and the ones that I had enjoyed the most for a number of years.
But those parts were also areas that had led me to stray further and further from the art. That art kept quietly whispering for more attention, and I kept pushing it aside.
For a while I thought that was okay, that it wouldn’t be a big deal, that I could successfully quiet the art-making call, but the little art spark kept knocking on my heart. As much as I tried to ignore it, it got louder and louder. I knew I needed to make space and time for it, again.
But as I made the space, I was surprised to find that the inspiration to create just wasn’t there.
What a fickle little creature.
When that creative spark didn’t immediately return, I subconsciously believed that if I believed art didn’t matter, then it would get me out of the responsibility of listening to it, creating it, and sharing it.
If I believed, “Art doesn’t matter” then I could just opt-out completely.
Because creating, putting thoughts and images and ideas on a page to share with the world is scary, right?
It’s vulnerable, it’s exposed, it’s raw, it’s real.
To make matters worse, I thought this new detached way of viewing something I’d spent so much of my life caring deeply about was “cool,” and shared it with another creative who was in an entirely different season.
Without missing a beat he emphatically said, “But it does matter!” and went on to share all of the reasons why art is essential - not in a bullet-pointed laundry list sort of way, but in a full-body-believe-this-to-be-true way that re-ignited some tiny ember of a spark that was still burning somewhere inside of me.
That small spark sparked my memory:
I was reminded of how I felt at 13 when I first saw one of Georgia O’Keeffe’s pastel drawings and knew in that moment why art mattered and that I wanted to be in artist.
I was reminded of how I felt at 16 when I learned darkroom photography and used it as a way to try to capture the beauty of this world, to say something meaningful, without a worry of how it would make money.
I was reminded of how I felt at 21 when I was fortunate enough to spend a month in New York City learning about art, witnessing art, and creating art for the sake of it with some of my closest creative friends.
I was reminded of how I felt at 25 when I started my creative business with bright eyes of what could be possible when art is used as a tool for connection, education, and potential.
All of those pivotal moments rushed through me in quick succession and re-ignited a truth so deeply rooted it’s impossible to let go of.
I left that conversation with a slight smile that reflected the willingness to trust creativity, again - to believe that hell yes, duh,
art does matter.
The vulnerability, the rawness, the realness - they are essential to living this life fully.
If you’re a creative reading this, my guess is deep-down you know this, too.
But some days it’s easy to believe the opposite and turn away from the creative call.
(And you can turn away from the creative knocking on your heart. That is an option!).
But for me? I don’t want to get to the end of my life, whenever that is, and see that I said no. I want to say yes to that call again and again and again and see where it leads.
Because this life is both long and brief and it’s made beautiful by how we choose to interact and engage with it.
In stepping back last year, in trying to walk away from the creative call, in trying to deny being an artist, so many thoughts have come my way about the creative journey and I don’t want to keep them to myself.
I want to share them with you to remind us both that yes,
art matters.
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What to Expect Here:
To start, I’ll be sharing one post on the last Tuesday of every month. Some months it might be more, but if that happens it will be like extra cute little nuggets.
For now, this is a free publication with the potential of paid subscriptions in the future. If you would be supportive of a paid version of this publication in the future, you can make a pledge now to express your interest.
Who’s invited to hang out here?
This is an inclusive and respectful space. I expect the content to most relate to fellow artists and creatives on the journey. Multiple viewpoints, perspectives, and lived-experiences are encouraged and welcomed. Hatred is not.
Looking forward to sharing the journey with you!
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