Life, love, and limerence
One of the most distressing and disruptive symptoms of limerence is the onset of obsessive, intrusive thoughts. The can t get them out of your head effect. Early on in the limerence experience, daydreaming about your limerent object feels wonderful. It s all giddy thrills and walking-on-air dreaminess. But, there s always a dark side too. At first [ ] The post How obsessive thoughts develop first…
It s summer. It s hot. I m currently on holiday. That means that this month s check in at the LwL virtual coffeehouse is a totally open thread. Catch up and gossip you marvellous people 🙂 The post Coffeehouse: open thread first appeared on Living with Limerence .
I ve always approached limerence from the perspective of a neuroscientist. I think it s fascinating how the basic mechanisms of the reward and bonding systems can escalate a thrilling and intoxicating high into a deeply ingrained behavioural addiction. At a fundamental level, the strength of transmission in dopamine pathways, and inhibitory feedback from the prefrontal cortex, [ ] The post How…
One of the great things for me about running living with limerence is that I can write about whatever I like, correspond with lots of different people, and not worry too much about algorithms and such. This contrasts quite strikingly with, say, YouTube. My videos over there are necessarily more targeted. I m posting on someone [ ] The post A new site for partners of limerents first appeared on…
Following on from last week s coffeehouse, where I asked for feedback on what to prioritise in the coming months here at living with limerence, this is another quick post, just to set out my thoughts. Thanks to all those who contributed, and sorry that I haven t been answering much in the comments thread (see point [ ] The post What’s coming next at LwL? first appeared on Living with Limerence .
It s July. It s very hot in the UK. Must be time for a nice steaming cup of coffee. I usually try to use the summer break as a chance to catch up and reflect. To think about where effort would be well focused for the second half of the year. I currently have a lot [ ] The post Coffeehouse: summer musings first appeared on Living with Limerence .
I m away on holiday this week, so just a quick check in with some good news. Smitten has been named one of the best non-fiction books of the year (so far) by Spotify. Obviously, I m delighted, and that delight is only somewhat muted by the fact that I don t use Spotify, and I can t actually [ ] The post Best book of the year (so far) first appeared on Living with Limerence .
This week s video: If you’re trapped in a mental state of limerence—a state of intense romantic infatuation—one of the best ways to recover is to go No Contact with the person that you’re obsessing over. It makes sense: if limerence is like an addiction, you should cut off your supply of love drug. But… what [ ] The post Escape from limerence when you can’t go No Contact first appeared on Living…
Note: this is an updated version of a previous post Limerence is a wild ride. A giddying, intoxicating, romantic high that takes over your mind and makes one person the absolute focal point of attention. If you re looking for love, that mental state can be great. If your limerent object is a good match, then [ ] The post Should limerents feel guilty about their limerence? first appeared on Living…
Another month, another visit to LwL virtual coffeehouse. Today s conversation starter is a wryly double-meaninged title about muses. It comes from a tweet (still calling them that) that I saw the other day: I think this exchange captures one of the dilemmas at the heart of limerence. It can provide a massive boost of energy [ ] The post Coffeehouse: musing about limerence first appeared on Living…