It's Better to Be Interested Than Interesting

First of all, I’m sorry. I know I’ve been posting a lot lately. And yes... I am having a bit of a breakdown. Fortunately for everyone involved, writing seems to be how I’m getting through it, instead of, say, normal coping mechanisms.

Here’s what happened: I was out on a run today, minding my own business, when I ran into a girl I once had a talking stage with. It was never that serious. We went on one date, and then... it just faded. The last message between us was her reacting to one of my texts with a simple 👍🏿. At that point, I took the hint. She wasn’t interested, and it was time to let it go. But seeing her again today took me right back to that version of myself, the one who was absolutely convinced we were going to end up together.

Turns out I wasn’t boring or unlikeable or whatever spiral I usually default to. I was just trying too hard to be interesting. Every text was a highlight reel. “Anyway here’s a fun fact about me.” “Anyway here’s another fun fact about me.” I basically ran my own TED Talk and she never bought a ticket.

Which brings me to today’s sermon: it’s better to be interested than interesting, especially in a talking stage, while everyone else is busy trying to sound like the most interesting person in the room. Meanwhile the real MVP is just sitting there going “wait why did your coworker do that” and accidentally becoming the most magnetic person in the chat without even trying.

Here’s the thing nobody tells you: curiosity is basically the cheat code. You don’t need a personality trailer, a résumé of cool stories, or a carefully curated “fun facts” folder. You need “okay but then what happened.” That’s the whole strategy. That’s the entire playbook. I just apparently didn’t get the memo until a random Sunday run made me relive it in real time.

Anyway. Lesson learned, several years and one awkward sidewalk wave too late. So yeah, sorry again for posting a lot. But also, not sorry, because someone had to say it: be interested, not interesting.