Long Lost Friendship

Growing up I never really had a best friend. I was part of different friend groups and would inevitably hangout with one friend more than other for a little while, but then spend more time with another person in that friend group. Sometimes I’d even hangout with someone new for a little while and then just become acquaintances after a few weeks.

That was basically through my entire educational life. First grade through graduation from college. All 7 years of college. I always had a lot of friends, but never one I could really say I was best friends with.

When I graduated college, I moved in with an old friend from my first freshman year. I hung out with other people that year as I’d usually do, but he was a friend I would randomly hangout with periodically. I actually almost never saw him again. When I lost my kidney and left school, few people knew I left. My original class graduated that summer. The following year my roommate at the time wanted to go to a bar. That friend was tending the bar we went to. It was 2000 and he’s a Yankees fan and I’m a Mets fan. The Mets and Yankees were in the World Series that year and we watched every game. In 2002 right when I graduated, he needed a roommate.

Of course when you live with someone, you become close. We basically did everything together. First he was a bartender and I’d go hangout while he worked and became friends with his regulars. Joined their fantasy football league and basically dominated the first few years. We would go to concerts. Baseball games. Movies. NASCAR.

His first girlfriend while I lived there had a daughter, so I would babysit her when they went out. I became close with his family. His 4 brothers had a text chain and I was added in. I talked to his brothers more than my own.

I was there when he met his future wife. I was his best man. He called me right after his wife told him they were having a baby. Like 2 minutes after she told him. Their son (and daughter) have known me their entire lives. I was invited to a family thanksgiving one year and his son was basically yelling my name from his high chair and laughing through most of dinner because I was on the other side of the table.

I watched his kids grow up. I watched him go from a bartender to a police officer to a detective to a director of a nonprofit. I rooted him on all the time. We were like brothers that actually liked each other. We were like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DaVito in the movie Twins. I’ll let you guess who was who.

We went to the beach every summer as a “family”. We basically knew everything about each other. I’d lived in 3 different places with him over a 10 year span. We’ve known each other 30 years.

Then 2020 happened. I was stuck alone at home. He had to take care of his family. He’s always lived an hour and a half away since I moved out of Rome, GA to Atlanta. At first, I’d basically go up every weekend and sometimes stay for long weekends. Eventually his son got old enough to play baseball, which turned into travel ball. They weren’t home on the weekends. I had Cheddar and it wasn’t quite as easy just packing up and visiting.

I tried to stay connected. Texts. Phone calls. But he got busier. Texts and calls stopped. Life happens. I still call him my best friend, especially after 30 years. Even if we talk less and less, he’ll never become just an acquaintance.